The Righteous Road
by AmbroseLunatic
Summary: The third installment in my Nikki/Juice Series. Let's see what the future has in store for this couple. Will also be looking into Juice family history a bit more. And we will see where Jax and Tully sit with Juice... Pie anyone? (bad joke, I'm just kidding!) :P
1. Chapter 1

**_Here we go my faithful readers, the third installment of my Nikki and Juice series. I am soooooo beyond excited for you guys to read this, and for me to write it for you to read :) Let's see how you like the first chapter?! R &R _**

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**_Chapter One_**

Nikki let out a frustrated groan, and sulked in her chair at Scoops, which was their ice cream shop, officially up and running. Chucky stood by her side, that cheesy grin plastered to his face, waiting for an answer.

"I don't know. I like them both!" Nikki groaned out, as she bounced a six month old Willow on her knee. The baby girl was teething, and drooling all over his little balled up fists, and a pink rattle that her daddy bought her with a built in teething ring. Currently Willow held the teething ring part in her mouth with a grip so fierce, slobber dribbling down her cheeks and chin, but she was still a dark brown curly haired mess of cuteness regardless.

It had been six months since Juice proposed to Nikki. She had been shocked, and asked him again, her mind on overdrive. She had asked him to let her think about it, and two days later, after a beautiful dinner, she had told him, "yes." They celebrated with wine, and he had massaged her aching shoulders, back and feet. In return she gave him a blow job, and spent the rest of the day in their pajamas, watching movies, diaper changes and breast feeding.

There was only a month two months left before the wedding. The couple had decided on a mid-November wedding. Everything was pretty much set, except for the food and the wedding cake.

Juice had been more than generous with Nikki, telling her, "This wedding is just for you babe, get whatever you want." He had failed to mention a price to her, so she had gone a little overboard in some areas, but what the hell, it was their day, and she wanted it to be special.

At the moment, Nikki was attempting to taste test two cakes Chucky had made and presented. One was a Strawberry and Cream cake with a hint of ginger. The second cake was a double fudge cake, with hazel nuts on the side, and a layer of vanilla cream on the inside.

Just as Nikki was getting frustrated with her decision of cake choices, because she wanted them both, a slew of bikers pulled up in front of Scoops. With a skip to his step, Chucky headed to the door, happily holding it open for the guys to walk in, Chibs, Bobby, Tig, Happy and Juice.

Juice headed over to his fiancé, slouched in the chair, and he picked Willow up, holding her above his head, as he blew raspberries into her belly, she giggled, and wiggled her arms and kicked her legs, before he rested her against his chest. He placed his hand on Nikki's shoulder, and she looked up at him, and he leaned down to kiss her. They lingered against each other a bit longer than they should have, but the guys didn't mind, chose to turn a blind eye to it instead.

"Mmm, you taste good baby." Juice whispered into her ear, after they broke apart. Nikki blushed, and she playfully smacked him, causing him to laugh, and take a seat next to her. Nikki picked up the spoon she previously used to taste the cakes, and spoon fed Juice the strawberry one first, then the chocolate one.

"Those are good, I like them both." Juice said, nodding. He picked Willow up, stood her up on his knees, rattle still in her fist. She smiled the biggest smile she could muster, and started baby jumping, bending her knees then popping them straight up again, rattle shaking in her hand as she let out a high pitched squeal ,catching everyone's attention.

"But which one do you like the best?" Nikki asked.

"I don't know. Which do you like?" Juice asked in returned.

"Both." They smiled at each other, like some secret, unspoken agreement. "Chucky!" Nikki called out, and within a split second, Chucky emerged from behind the counter.

"Can you keep the chocolate fudge cake, but mix the strawberry cake with it?" Juice asked, trying his best to explain the cake mixing with a bouncing, giggling baby on your lap is not so easy.

"Just mix the two together." Nikki offered simply.

"I accept that." Chucky said, smiling from ear to ear, nodding like an obedient dog. He reached out with those fake plastic hands of his, and managed to pull the plates onto them before skipping off behind the counter.

A group of teenage girls walk in, huddled together and giggling. By the looks of it they looked to be around fifteen maybe sixteen, and they looked nervous. Happy probably wasn't helping that in anyway, he was staring at them as if they all shared one body with all their own heads on top of one shoulder. Way, the girls walked in, giggling like mad, and Chucky greeted them happily. It took a few minutes, some of the girls already knowing what their favorite flavors were, and other wanted to taste test every single one of those damn flavors. Chucky was more than happy to help with that.

Finally when all eight orders had been made, the girls tucked themselves in a booth in the corner, talking quietly amongst themselves and giggling. A few minutes later Rat came in, pulling his gloves of as he took a seat at the bar stools, which Happy was standing, leaning against the side of the counter. The quiet banter between the teens got even quieter, and it made Happy that much more curious. Happy didn't trust anyone, except for his own, other people, no way, there was a while when Chucky first came along that he didn't like him either. The man was probably thinking something along the lines that one of the girls had an AK stashed in her back pocket and once she was done with her ice cream, would pull it out and use it on every single one of them, on behalf of a rival club. He knew the thought sounded ridiculous, but he couldn't help it, something was fishy with those girls, just like something was fishy with every single person that walked into their shop. None of those girls had anything in their pockets or even down their pants, they were all wearing tiny shorts, and tank tops, dressed like little hookers, Happy thought.

Rat wiped his forehead of sweat, and asked Chucky for a scoop of ice cream. The boy was skinny as hell, but could out eat anyone anytime.

About five minutes later, a brown haired girl with big brown eyes got up from the table, shyly walked over to Rat, ignoring the confused glare happy was giving her, she leaned in, eyes staring into his when she finally got his attention. She grabbed his face in hers, and smashed her lips to his. When she finally pulled away, they stared into each other's eyes. Rat had been completely taken off guard, head spinning, and his stomach was doing this weird swirling thing like a tornado or something. She let go of his face, smiled, and skipped out of the ice cream shop, her friends following her.

The rest of the guys just stared at him, speechless. It was Nikki who stood up, cradling her now sleeping infant in her arms, patted Rat on the shoulder, and said: "Don't get too giddy now." Before walking out of Scoops and over to her brand new black Jetta. It wasn't anything fancy, she had always wanted a new car, never had one, and about a month after Willow was born, Juice had surprised her with it, saying that she would need something reliable to get their daughter to and from doctor's appointments, or just in case of an emergency, because he wasn't going to take their baby on their bike, at least not for a good long time.

Juice followed her out, taking the baby carrier, and clicking it into the basket it sat in, in the back seat. Juice then pushed Nikki against the car door, his hands resting on her now curvy hips. Pregnancy had changed her body, where she thought she was curvy before, she was even more curvy, her breasts were bigger, her stomach a little more fluffy, thighs a little bigger, and for a long time she had been depressed about her new looks, but Juice had assured her that she looked beautiful, and he loved her and he wouldn't have her any other way. It had taken her two months before she let him see her naked again, feeling completely embarrassed with her body image. Juice had enough, after two more than two months of no sex, since the last month of pregnancy Nikki was bloated like a large balloon and was simply too tired and too uncomfortable to have sex. Juice had been more than understanding and attentive to all her needs, but he finally couldn't take it anymore, and pushed her down to that mattress and fucked her long and hard, whispering dirty things into her ear, and when they both came, he held her close, peppering kisses along her jaw and neck, and telling her how much he loved her and how beautiful she looked laying in his arms.

Nikki wrapped her arms around him, looking up at him through her large sunglasses, a smile on her face, playful as ever as she pushed her hips forward against Juices. He smiled down at her, she wiggled her eyebrows playfully. They shared another loving kiss, but Juice broke it off. "I have a few things I need to take care of at the garage, but I'll be home soon. Alright?"

"Sure babe." Nikki said, "But you are going to make this up to me later." She said grinning.

"Who? Me?" Juice asked, exaggerating, "Of course baby, just wait and see what I have planned for you tonight." He said into her ear. She giggled, and squealed just a little when she felt him nibble at her neck, before placing a soft kiss there.

"I better go before this one wakes up." Nikki said. Juice stepped away, and watched Nikki turn to get in the car. He had to take advantage, so he stepped up, pulled his hand back, and smacked her ass. Nikki quickly got in the car, turning her head out the window, and playfully glaring at him, she couldn't keep a straight face though, and soon broke out in a wide smile. "I love you." Juice said. "I love you too," Nikki replied, and she drove away.


	2. Chapter 2

**_Phew! It's been a long week, and it's only tuesday! So I know it hasn't been long since I posted the first chapter, but to me it feels like it's been forever since I've updated, and there for I have this beautiful long chapter for you!_**

 ** _And also I have done my best to fulfill everyones requests from last chapters reviews, so again hope you like it._**

 ** _As for Rat being a pimp... That would be a great story, maybe I will think about doing something with that haha!_**

 ** _And to the guest reviewer, thank you I really appreciate that. It makes me so happy to hear you guys thinking that highly of my writing skills, but I think you have me held up too high lol. Enjoy and hope you guys review and let me know how you liked it! Love you all :)_**

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 ** _Chapter Two_**

Chibs and Juice sat quietly in the club house. Chibs was pondering the request Juice had made, and honestly, he wasn't sure why the kid would bother coming to him for something like that. He couldn't tell him the right or wrong thing; it was Juice himself who had to answer that question for himself.

"Why are you telling me?" Chibs asked.

"Because I need someone with a level head to tell me I don't need it."

"Aye well, you do need it. It's just a matter of when you going to do it." With that Chibs got up, walked through the double doors of the club house, and into the bar area. Juice could hear the Chibs faint voice asking for a drink to be poured.

Juice sat back in the wooden chair with a sigh. He knew it was a bad idea to go and see Jax, none of the club members wanted anything to do with him. You don't set someone, especially a brother, up to be killed, and expect your brothers to be okay with it. But for Juice, he had so many questions and the more he kept asking himself, the more his mind itched to see the answers only Jax had.

Then there was Tully. The more Juice thought about him, and his childhood, and his sister the more anger and resent he had in him. He hated the man that took his mother's life, because she was sleeping with a black man? Because Juice was black and not white? Then there was his father, whom Juice had no idea who he was. And all he kept thinking about was the fact that now he was a father, and he would do anything to spend as much time with his daughter as he could, why did his dad do that?

With a sigh and restless mind, Juice stood up, walked out of the club house and into the bar area. He patted Chibs on the back, and told him he was going home for the rest of the day. Chibs nodded, downing a shot of clear liquid. "Aye." Chibs said, cupping the back of Juices neck, "And listen, don't you let that rat get to you. He's gone, he's not your problem anymore. Leave it alone now; go take care of your family." Juice bowed his head, hand resting on Chibs shoulder, and said: "Thanks man," and then walked out, got on his bike, revved up the engine, and took off.

It was only a ten minute ride from the garage to the house, with the sun shining on his back and the wind in his face, he pushed his thoughts to the back of his mind and focused on the road and on getting home to his fiancé and his daughter. But before going home, Juice decided to make a detour, parking his bike on the side of a small gas station just up the street. He smiled to himself as he ran in. In the front of the store, there was a small display of assorted flowers, and boquets of roses, Juice piked up the best looking one, and purchased it.

When Juice got home, he hid the flowers behind his back, and walked quietly through the house, following the loud babbling of his daughter, and the sound of some toy going off. He got to the living room and found Willow set up on the floor, lying on her stomach, arms pushed out in front of her, as if she was trying to get up, but couldn't quite get a grip. Just a few inches away, Nikki's back was turned towards Juice, her shoulders hunched forward, her head was down, and then a sob erupted into the air. Juice's heart sank, and he quickly made his way to Nikki, who was crying.

"Hey baby, what's wrong?" Juice asked, sitting down next to her. Willow took sight of her father, and let out a squeal of a giggle, and buried her face into the carpet, before looking back up, her little chubby legs kicking behind her.

"It's all a mess!" Nikki cried, exasperated.

"What is?" Juice asked again, this time taking Nikki into his arms, and rubbing her shoulder for comfort.

"I just got a call from the wedding dress place, and... apparently.." Nikki's voice started to crack again, and she broke down into tears. Juice pulled her into his lap now, and this time both his arms wrapped around her. He rubbed her back, and whispered soothing words into her ear until she was able to catch her breath long enough to tell him what happened. "They said that my dress was one of many dresses to be discontinued. They said they were very sorry, but there is not going to be a wedding dress, and then they offered to have me come back in the store and pick out a new one, with a five hundred dollar credit to my account." Nikki finished, and started to wail again. Juice couldn't help but smile slightly behind Nikki's hair. He loved how flustered she could make herself. Maybe it was because he was a guy, but he didn't really see the big deal, there were so many other dresses to choose from.

"Babe, you know I love you right?" Juice whispered. Nikki nodded, and Juices thumb dried her tears away. "You know we have plenty of time to find a new dress."

"But that was my dress, I wanted that dress. We don't have very much time. What am I going to do?"

"Look, your stressed out, and you don't need to be. I'll even give you an extra five hundred so you actually have more money and you can find yourself a better dress than that one. Theres a reason why things like this happen. That dress might be bad luck."

Nikki leaned back, tilted her head up, as if she were thinking about it. She sniffled, and hiccupped, and nodded, "Okay. You're right." She said, her lip still quivering. Juice smiled at her, kissed her lips, and pulled away, only to place the small bouquet of roses into Nikki's lap. She let out a gasp of surprise, "For me?" She said.

"No not for you, I forgot to tell you, I met this woman, this crazy beautiful woman, and I have fallen madly in love with her, and she has a tendency to get upset at the simplest things." Juice started, a smirk growing on his lips. Nikki sat back, a playful smile tugging on her lips as well. "Oh really?" She asked.

"Oh yeah!" Juice started up again, "Oh, and I forgot to mention, she is the mother of my beautiful baby, and hopefully will be the mother of a lot more of my beautiful babies, and she even agreed to marry me."

"Wow, she must be a lucky girl." Nikki said, a smile on her face, tears completely gone.

"No, he's a very lucky guy." Juice said, pulling her back down, their lips connecting. Nikki moaned into the kiss, and Juice leaned back, so Nikki was on top of him. Their tongues colliding, battling for dominancy, as Juices hands worked their way under her shirt, but a the sudden crying of baby Willow broke the couple up, play time is over.

Nikki sighed, her head dropping to Juices shoulder, as she began to cry again.

Juice instantly sat up, "Hey. No more tears."

"I'm sorry Carlos, It's just been a stressful day today, and I really just want to have some alone time with you. Willow refused to take a nap today, and I'm just so tired."

"Hey, hey, baby, listen to me. Why don't you go and take a bath, relax a little bit. I'm going to feed Willow, change her, then get her to bed. Then I will take care of you." Juice whispered into Nikki's ear, placing a kiss on her neck, and scraping his teeth over the same spot. Nikki moaned, and tilted her head, but Juice stopped just as quickly as he started. "Go take a bath, and I'll take care of Willow."

Nikki nodded, and got up. As she walked down the hall way, made sure to wiggle her hips more than necessary, Juice just laughed, gave a whistle, "I'll get you later!" He called out, and Nikki let out a laugh.

Juice scooped up Willow, "Guess it's just you and me. You hungry?" He asked, placing a soft kiss to the top of her head, and the both headed to the kitchen. Juice scanned the shelf of baby food, "What would you like to eat?" He picked up a can of Gerber food, "Chicken noodle it is!" Juice said, popping the lid off, and putting the jar into the microwave to be warmed up. While he waited for the beep, and it didn't take long, Juice placed Willow into her high chair, where she started drumming her fists playfully on the table part of the chair.

After the microwave beeped, Juice picked up the little jar of baby food, and sat down in front of his daughter, who was all smiles for him. He taste tested the baby food first, making sure it wasn't too hot or too cold, nope it was perfect, and he laughed at himself. _Ah man, Juicy, did you ever expect to be a dad, and to be a good one at that?_ Juice asked mentally asked himself. In all honesty, no he couldn't. How could he? He was an outlaw, a trouble maker, he had partial ownership of a weed shop, he's killed people before. He doesn't have a steady job, and never will, he will forever be an outlaw, a man that will most likely end up in jail from time to time, a man that will kill for his bothers in arms, and his family and not think twice about it, a man wears a Kutte and wears it proudly. But most of all, the most important, he's a man that will stand by his wife's side, and support her, and love her. He's a man that will raise their daughter together, and love her and protect her, and guide her in the right direction, because fuck if he lets her end up in the same way as he did, and he will not have her become a crow eater. No his daughter will go to college, and become a doctor or something fucking important.

By the time Juice was done feeding the wiggly six month old, she had baby food all over her hands, face, and clothes, some of it was even in her hair. Juice smiled and thought: _Wonder how much of that actually went in her mouth?_

"Guess its bath time for you too, huh?" Willow ignored her father, and took to squeezing the clumps of baby food in her tiny hands and laughing about it.

Juice was quick, picking her up and getting her to the bathroom where he ran her a warm bath, and carefully undressed her, trying to keep the mess of baby food contained to just his daughter's body and her clothes, but that failed. The baby food ended up on his clothes, and on the floor, the walls, and even the side of the tub. _How can one small person make such a big mess?_

By the time Juice was done, there was water everywhere, as well as dirty baby clothes. He had made a mental note to clean it up afterwards, but he got to doing other things and forgot about the dirty bathroom. His daughter was fussy, which meant she was sleepy, and he had a promise to keep.

An hour later, Willow was sound asleep in her crib, and Juice made his way into his bedroom he shared with Nikki. She was in a bar and panties, lacey and black with pink bows sitting on her hips. Juice groaned at the sight of her, just sitting on the bed, putting lotion all over her body, she didn't even know she was being watched, and that made Juices cock stir.

Juice climbed onto the bed, on his hands and knees, right behind Nikki. He pushed a kiss where the top of her panties started, on the left side of her lower back, then his tongue darted out, licking a trail up her spine, and stopped once he got to her bra, Juice unclasped it with one hand, the other hand holding him up. His tongue continued on the same trail, up, up, up, until he reached the back of her neck. Juice was holding Nikki's hair to the side, as he started to kiss and flick his tongue across the back and side of her neck. Nikki moaned, and tilted her head to the side, allowing Juice more access. He worked her neck a little more, before pulling her back, and laying her down.

Juice climbed over her, their bodies pressed together, only separated by boxers, pants and Nikki's sexy panties. Juice had lost his shirt in the bathroom, not wanting to get baby food back on his clean daughter, plus it was covered in water from her splashing and playing.

Juice took a minute to lavish her body, taking in her full figure, before bringing his lips down to hers. Her arms hung loose around his neck, holding him in place as she caressed the back of his neck. He only separated just enough to trail a line of butterfly kisses along her jaw, down her neck and to her chest. He circled his tongue around one of her nipples, nibbling on it enough to make it hard. She arched her back, and moaned with anticipation. Juice worked her other nipple as well, teasing it, and pinching and rolling it between his fingers, until they were both rock hard. He pressed a kiss at the valley of her chest, trailing down until he got to her belly button which he dipped his tongue into. She moaned, her back arching again. Her own hands played with her nipples, as she looked down at Juice, who was now placing himself between her legs. He pressed a kiss to her inner thigh, and then again to the other one. He dipped his head in, flicking his tongue over her clit, circling his tongue around it. She was moaning, her legs trembling, and she was incredibly wet for him. Her mind was swirling with want and need, and she couldn't make up her mind which one she needed the most. She felt his tongue slip just a little lower, and felt herself fill up with his tongue as he dived inside of her, tongue fucking her. She moaned, and wrapped her legs around his neck, the heels of her feet digging into his back, as he continued to thrust his tongue inside of her.

Nikki let out a cried out moan, and then pleaded with him to, "Please, baby, please. I need… I…" But she was so close, so undone, she didn't know, she couldn't think straight, nor could she put together a coherent sentence for him to understand.

Juice pulled out, licking his lips, his chin dripping with her juices, and he used the back of his hand to wipe it away. "What baby? What do you want?" He asked her, his fingers dipping inside her, two at a time, and curling upward in a "come here" motion, his tongue flicking over her clit again, and his eyes were fixed on her.

"I'm gonna come. So close." She said, through a breathy moan. Her hips were now moving on their own accord, working in time with Juices fingers and tongue, but she stilled upon feeling a third digit enter her, she was being stretched, and she was full, and she felt so deliciously good. Her whole body one fire, and just as she came down, her hips meeting his face and fingers, her legs closed around him, and she was coming.

Juice got off the bed, removing his own clothes as she was coming down from her climax, her body still trembling from it. A week with little sleep and no sex, her body was on a sexual overdrive and screamed at her for sexual attention. Juice was as well, but gave her the space she needed. He had never forced sex upon her, or made her feel bad for not putting out. Even after she had given birth to willow, and it took almost a month for her to be ready to have sex again, Juice was patient with her, and never strayed away looking for sex. He had gone longer periods of time with it, and he loved her enough to be truthful to her. But right now with her naked and sprawled out, her body glistening a light sweat, and after glow of the pleasure he just inflicted on her body, his own needs were screaming at him.

Juice crawled on the bed, between her legs, and snaked up her body. His cock was straight out in front of him, throbbing and twitching with need. Their lips collided in a gentle battle of love. His hands gently gliding over her legs, pulling them up and apart, as he slowly entered her. She was so slick with it, and Juice moaned, his head falling to the crook of her neck, and she wrapped her arms around her, as well as her legs. He filled her up, and pulled back out, pushed back in, and out, in and out, her breathy moans picked up again, filling his ears like beautiful music. He turned his head inward, and filled her neck with delicious kisses, and gentle bites, as his hips picked up speed, pulling out and slamming back into her. She could feel him pulsing inside of her, and she started gliding her hers against him, creating a glorious friction between the two of them.

All too soon Nikki felt that warm feeling spreading in the pit of her belly. Body trembling, and her legs tightening around his waist. His balls also tightening, and his then they were just nails and teeth. He forced her wrists down to the bed, as he pounded into her, angling himself just perfectly and she was silently screaming his name. Their bodies clenching, and tightening, and spilling into each other, as they came, and juice was suddenly too tired, too drenched in the afterglow of what they had just done to move. Nikki didn't mind, she cuddled him close, and soon, they fell asleep.


	3. Chapter 3

**_Chapter Three_**

In the morning, Juice took it upon himself to get Willow up, diaper changed, and fed, and clothed. By the time Nikki got up, she found Juice on the floor with Willow. She wasn't sure what kind of game they were playing, but included lots of baby talk and lots of funny faces on Juices part.

Nikki stayed back, leaned against the wall, and just watched her family. She smiled to herself, and wondered how she got so lucky?

However, Nikki had noticed a change in Juice over the last six months. He was not the same care free fun loving guy she knew and loved. She knew it was because of that day, knew that Tully had got in his head, and was now living up there like a leech. And some of it was Jax too, because a brother turned on brother doesn't just sit comfortably in the pit of your stomach.

Nikki walked over to where Juice was still making goofy faces and Willow, and kneeled down next to her. "Good morning baby." Nikki greeted, kissing Juice on the cheek. "Morning." Juice greeted back, returning the kiss.

"Any plans today?" Nikki asked, as she scooped Willow into her arms, and the baby girl settled down on her shoulder, cooing softly into her ear.

"Yeah, I have to go to TM this morning, and I…" Juice paused, lips pressed together, and his eyes adverted to the carpet, and Nikki knew what was coming next. "I'm going to go to Stockton today and sit down with Jax."

Nikki swallowed the dry lump in her throat as she nodded. "Are you going to be okay with that? Are the guys okay with that? Is someone going to go with you?"

"Relax Nik. Yeah, Chibs is going with me. And… don't worry about me, I'll be fine. I just need answers, you know?"

"Alright baby. Maybe when you get back we can do something, maybe go to the park?"

"Sure babe."

Juice walked into TM, scanning the room for their president, but couldn't find him anywhere. _Shit!_ Bobby walked passed him carrying a box full of papers. "Oh hey, Bobby, seen Chibs around?"

"Yeah earlier, said he had some business to take care of, said that you'd probably come by looking for him. Told me to tell you to go down to Caracara and fix the camera, said Lyla was complaining that it wasn't working properly."

"Shit, man, I can't do that right now, I have somewhere I need to be." Juice whined.

Bobby dropped the box, with a heavy thud, onto his desk, tucked away in the corner of TM. Bobby Elvis was in charge of all things financial, he was the best in the business for that. Bobby turned his attention to Juice, "Want to tell me what's going on?"

"No man, just… Do you know where Chibs went?"

"He said something about going up to Stockton." Bobby said, before ruffling through the never ending stack of papers in the box, finding odd bits, and pulling them out, making piles on his desk.

"What? Why? Too see Jax?" Juice asked a little too quickly. Bobby stopped work on the papers, and eyed Juice. "What's going through your head, kid?" Bobby asked.

"Nothing, forget it." Juice said, turning around, and stomping off. During his exit, he passed Happy, who called out his name, but Juice didn't hear any of it, just kept walking.

When Juice got to Caracara, the ride had done little too cool him down. If anything, the open road just gave him time to think and dwell on what Chibs had done, or hadn't done, and that was, wait for him. They were supposed to go together. Juice had a million questions for Jax, and he needed answers to them, at least to some of them. Juice had felt betrayed once again, by Chibs going out on his own.

But he hadn't gone on his own had he? He didn't see the prospects at the garage, and Tig was MIA, and the guy practically lived at Teller Morrow. Had Chibs opted for Tig instead of him? If that was the case, he'd be pissed, but right now he had to push it to the back of his mind, he had work to do, and regardless weather or not Chibs had gone to see Jax, he was going to Stockton, with or without Chibs by his side.

"Thank god you are here." Lyla said. "I have a shoot in thirty minutes, and I don't know what is going on with the system, but it crashed sometime last night and I haven't been able to get it working again."

"I'll look at it, see what I can do." Juice said, his voice edgier than normal, and Lyla noticed. Gently she placed her hand on Juices shoulder, catching his attention, "What happened?" She asked.

There was always a soft spot in all the guys hearts for Lyla, she wasn't just another croweater. She was Opies old lady, and she was a mother. She always worked her ass off, and eventually took over Luann's place as director of Caracara after her death. It wasn't until after Opie's death, right after Juice decided he had to get out of town for a while, that everyone took Lyla seriously. Not only was she once again a single parents, but she was a widow, and in that, gained two more children. Those children were also grieving the loss of their father, as well as their mother. The whole thing was just a sad case, but in that, the club learned that Lyla wasn't such a bad person. She was actually incredibly nice, a sweetheart in fact. Always caring about others, putting her son and her step kids needs before hers, there were plenty of days where she showed up at work, eyes drooping from sleep deprivation, and crying because she didn't know how she could make ends meet and raise three kids alone. That's when Jax had the idea of getting Caracara up and running again, and this time Lyla would run it. It was a rocky start up at first, but within a month, the doe was rolling in, and Lyla's stress seemed to diminish. However, there were still times when she would walk into work looking like shit, eyes red from crying. She missed her husband, and so did his kids. Those days she'd just hold his son and daughter, and they would cry together, and remember the ones they loved and lost.

"I'm fine." Juice said, his voice shaking just slightly. After looking into his eyes long enough, and Juice forcing a smile on his face for her sake, she finally nodded, telling him, "If you need anything, just let me know." Juice thanked her, and started work on the system that had shut down.

It took about two hours to get the damn thing cleaned up, but as soon as it was finished, Juice sighed with relief, "It's done. You had a bad bug on there, I got it all cleaned up, so you should be good to go. I also installed a virus and spy ware protection, for some reason, the one I installed before, when you first started up, was wiped out. Just make sure you run it weekly, it will keep the bugs away."

Lyla thanked him, kissed him on the cheek, and gave him a warm hug before he walked out the door.

Juice made the drive to Stockton, which seemed to take longer than normal. He sat in the parking lot, lit up a joint, and called Nikki.

"Hello?" Nikki answered.

"Hey babe."

"Hey back." She said with a smile on her face, even though he couldn't see it, "Where are you?"

"I'm at Stockton, with Chibs and Tig." Juice said. "Just wanted to call you before I went in, just wanted to tell you I love you and hear your voice."

Nikki blushed, "I love you too, but is everything okay? Why are you over there?"

Juice let out a puff of smoke, he knew this question would come up, and he wasn't going to tell her the reason to her face in fear of her getting upset or telling him she didn't want him going. Now he was already there, and there wasn't anything she could do about it. "I came to see Jax. I needed to talk to him." He heard Nikki sigh on the other end, and lowered his head.

"I thought we talked about this. You weren't going to dwell on it. It's over and done with."

"I just need a few questions answered, that's all. Don't worry babe, I'll be fine. I love you."

"Please be careful, I love you too."

Juice hung up the phone, and shoved it back in his pocket, but made no attempted at going inside. Instead he leaned against his bike, all but glaring at Chibs and Tigs bikes. Those bastards went without him, they were inside right now, probably sitting across from Jax, asking all the questions Juice needed to hear for himself.

Twenty minutes later the prison doors opened up, and Chibs and Tig walked down the steps side by side. Chibs pulling down his sun glasses, Tig already wearing his.

Juice stood up, arms falling to his sides, as he walked to half way to Chibs and Tig.

"Juicy boy, what are you doing down here? Thought you were supposed to be fixing things up at Caracara?" Chibs asked nonchalant.

"Yeah, it's fixed already, and I'm here because I was supposed to be here, remember?"

"Aye." Chibs answered, slipping one hand into his leather gloves.

"That's it? You're not going to say anything else?" Juice asked, throwing his arms up in the air. The kid was red in the face, and looking like he was a mix between wanting to cry and wanting to knock Chibs teeth down his throat.

"What do you want me to say? Yeah, I came here without you. I sat down with Jax. I brought Tig instead of you, and you want to know why I did it? Aye, I'll tell you why." Chibs said lighting up a cigarette and sucking in a deep breath of intoxicating smoke. "I did it because I needed to know. I brought you into this club and I let you down, I didn't see what Jax was doing, I was blind to him, not anymore Juicy. You can get pissed off all you want, but I went in there and I asked him some difficult questions, and I did it because I needed to know. I needed to be able to protect you. To save you from hearing all that shite, so you can go home at the end of the day with a smile on your face, and be able to hug and kiss your old lady, and so you can hold your daughter. You are the only one in this club that can do that, none of us are able to do that. We gave you a clean slate by giving you back your basic privileges, your earning straight, lad." Chibs said, grabbing the back of Juices neck, shaking a little, "I love you, lad, but you got to stop thinking that were going behind your back to hurt you. It's not that. I don't want to have another Opie on my hands. I got a wife and daughter I don't see. Lyla's got three kids, two of which don't belong to her, Tig has two daughters that he can't see, and Jax, he's fucked it all for himself now. He's not ever going to see those boys again. You, Juicy, you're the clean one of the club, the breath of fresh air, and I want to keep it that way. I don't need another fucking tree swinging Juice on my conscious."

Chibs words slapped Juice in the face so hard, he stumbled back a few steps. He couldn't see how sitting down with Jax without him would help him in the least bit, but he forced the bitterness down his throat, closed his eyes for a second, and calmly asked, "What happened?"

* * *

 _ **Hey guys, so I just want to tell you how sorry I am for not updating this sooner. Things have in insanely crazy around here, and I haven't had much time to write, so just bare with me for a while. Also the next chapter will be explaining Chibs and Tigs visit in detail. Hope you guys like it, and reviews please, because I love to read what you have to say. You guys are really the best! Thank you *Huggles***_


	4. Chapter 4

**_Hey guys, hope this isn't too much of a disappointment, I tried to come up with something a bit different for this chapter, lets hope I did that?_**

 ** _On a positive note, Theo Rossi "Juice" Is now a father. I heard his wife gave birth to a baby boy named Kane Alexander Rossi. So cute! I can't wait to see pictures! Anyways, hope you guys enjoy this update, please review!_**

* * *

 ** _Chapter Four_**

"And you don't think it's a good idea?" Tig asked, leaning back in his chair.

"No. A brother turned, whatever happened between Juice and Jax, Juice had no idea about it. Jax had something planned for the lad, and I don't want him finding out, and trying and succeeding in swinging from the tree again. I already have Opies death on my conscious, and I have to look at his wife every day and hear about his kids and how they miss their mother and father. I don't want to have to deal with another one." Chibs explained.

"Alright man, let's go talk to Jax. Find out what the hell happened."

"Aye."

It was early morning when the two left on their bikes for Stockton. When they arrived they had about ten minutes to kill before visitation hours started. They spent the time smoking, and just staring off into nothing.

They had to swallow a hard pill that day, when they saw Jax leaving in handcuffs, and knowing that he had set Juice up for something, but none of them new what that something was, apparently not even Juice.

Jax had his own agenda that day, in fact, Jax had always had his own agenda. Everyone thought that the kid becoming the next club prez would have done him good. They all had big plans, getting out of drugs and guns and start earning straight. There had been more bloodshed in that time period than they could imagine. Opie lost his life, Jax's best friend, and Juice tried to kill himself. If that didn't alert danger than what did?

Tig and Chibs sat down in a small white room with a table and four chairs. One of the officers told them it would be a few more minutes, "Just sit tight, we'll bring him out."

Tig took a seat without a problem, but Chibs was more fidgety than normal. He stood behind the spare chair that was meant for him to sit in, hands resting on the back of it, as he leaned forward, head down. Anyone that looked at him would have thought he was hurt or something. After a minute or two there was a large door on the opposite wall that opened up, the same door the guard left through. Two guards returned, this time Jax accompanied them. Cuffed at the wrists and ankles, the guards pulled out the chair, and motioned for Jax to sit down, which he did. His fingers enlaced with his own, lips pursed together, he relaxed just a bit when he heard the door behind him shut, and they were alone, for the time being.

At first it was awkward and quiet, three sets of eyes just staring into each other. For Jax it was a reunion he didn't think would come, weather it was good or bad, it didn't matter. All he could hope for was to hear at least some good news, his sons are happy, Tara is doing just fine, but he wasn't going to hear anything unless someone started talking.

"How's Tara, and my boys?" Jax asked, and it wasn't until his lips started moving that Chibs took noticed of the cut on the corner of his lip, which matched the shiner on his left eye, as well as the scabbed over cut on his right cheek bone, his knuckles also wore the badge of a fight. It was something that was bound to happen when inside, you couldn't escape it.

"Tara is fine. The boys miss you, but Tara is doing a good job. She's taking the boys on vacation in a few days. Those boys need stability in their lives, and now they can finally have that." Chibs offered. They couldn't have it before, no, because their father was the president of a motor cycle club, and they were in some deep shit. They all had blood on their hands, but Jax's were stained the most, dipped in the damn blood of his victims and played around in it like paint, however, it wasn't all his fault. The way the club was left after Clay passed away, also the doing of Jax, although it was a club vote, Jax wanted to pull the trigger. It took a long time to get the place cleaned up, and right now the club was doing good, they could finally breathe.

Jax seemed to accept Chibs offer of information, because he sat back in his chair, and nodded his head, as though he was mentally accepting the fate of his family, and it would never be the way it was before. He would never see his boys again, he would never hold Tara close, or make love to her, he would never be able to look into her eyes, and tell her he loved her. In a way he broke her free from himself the day he was taken into custody. It was a silent offer of hope for his family, one he too silently accepted.

"Let's cut the crap. You know why were here?" Tig stated, not wanting to waste anymore time.

It was a harder pill for Chibs to swallow, mostly because he had watched Jax and Opie grow up, and pulled them out of harms way more times than he can count, just like he had done for Juice. Chibs saw those boys like step kids, and prided himself on having a hand in raising every single one of them, keeping them on the right path, the chosen path. How many times had Gemma walked up to him, placed her warm moist lips upon his cheek and thanked him for keeping her son safe. Now it was different, no one could keep Jax safe, not after what he did, what would be next? The next thing Jax would set someone else up in the club, and Chibs as the new VP couldn't/ wouldn't have that, he had to protect Juice, the way he used to protect Jax and Opie, it was Juices turn now.

"I could assume." Jax said, opening his hands, as if he was opening up the invitation for conversation.

"Juice." Chibs said.

Jax nodded, leaned back in the hard plastic chair he was given to sit in, "What about him?"

"We need to know why you had set him up." Chibs asked.

"Why? He do something you don't like?"

"That's not your concern."

"Juice was a threat."

"Was?" Chibs asked. Tig was just there mainly to listen in.

"Yeah, was, not anymore. It's in the past, and I'm out of the club, so I guess it doesn't matter anymore, after all, I'm locked up, can't get much worse than this, can it?"

"Better start explaining, Jackie. None of this is making much sense."

Jax sighed, leaned forward, head down. He didn't think there would come a time where he would have to spill his dirty secret, but nothing ever went as planned. "Remember when Juice came clean about Darvany and Miles? Miles was first. He killed Miles, and told me about it. I offered him a way out by killing Darvany, and told him he had to keep his mouth shut. Then he took a swing from the tree." Jax paused, swallowing the invisible lump in his throat, his eyes tearing up.

"Is that the reason why you set him up?"

"No." Jax said.

"After he came back, he went to my wife and told her what I had him do. That I set him up to kill a woman, a mother, he warned her about me, and told her that I wasn't a safe person to be around, or to have the boys around. That week was hell. I don't know when or how things changed, but they did. Then the whole thing about Tara being pregnant, and signing the divorce papers, it all made sense. Juice set me up."

"So you had to take your revenge out on him, right?" Chibs questioned.

"I started doing research on his past, everyone comes from somewhere, even Juice, a lost boy with no family, there had to be _someone_ out there, and there was. I found Tully, talked to him. Tully said he could help me take care of the problem since Juice was his problem from the start. We shook on it, and that's when all the shit went down. Looks like I was the one to lose."

"Jesus Christ, Jackie. Did you even hear what you just said?"

"I know what I said. I know what I did." Jax yelled, tears spilling from his eyes. "Everything just went to shit. Things were shit when Clay was voted out, things got worse when I took over, and I felt like a god damned failure. I had to do something, even if that would have been the last thing I did. I needed to get even with him. I needed it to be right." Jax said.

Chibs stood up followed by Tig, "Juice is going to want to see you, he's going to want to hear this story for himself, and I have to figure out if the boys head is clear enough to handle the shite that you created for him." Chibs started to walk away, but stopped once again. "You know Jackson, all the stupid shite you did when you were a kid, all the shite you and Ope got into, I was always there for you. Always covering your arse, covering for you so you wouldn't get in trouble, maybe this is my fault. Maybe if I let you fall on your face you would have learned your lesson, that's the problem, you always had a cushion, so did Opie, because the legacy of SAMCRO would be passed down to the two of you, and all I had to do was make sure you two didn't fuck it up. I'm not going to let that happen to Juice."

With that, Chibs and Tig walked away. So many emotions and thoughts ran through his mind. How would he stop Juice from hearing the story Jax just told him, because when Juice wanted answers, he wouldn't stop until he got them. Maybe it's for the best, maybe the kid needed this closure, or maybe it would go south, and fuck his head up even more. Either way, Chibs would make sure he did the right thing, but for right now, he didn't need to know.


	5. Chapter 5

**_Hey guys! So, I've been taking some "me" time lately, and I'm so sorry I've been lacking on this story. Hopefully I can make it up to you through this chapter. Let me know what you think, please review :)_**

* * *

 ** _Chapter Five_**

Juice inhaled a deep breath, as he leaned against the side of the building, before letting his breath back out again, his brain just trying to comprehend what Chibs had just told him. His chest heaved, and his stomach rolled with nausea, and suddenly Juice was bent over, spilling the contents of his stomach on the side of Teller Morrow, when he was finished, he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, and stood against the wall once again, catching his breath.

Juice had no intentions of hurting Jax, however the man had a dark streak in him, an ice cold dark streak. Juice had no warning signs, and he wasn't even that close to him, what would he do to someone like Tara if she got him mad enough? He had to warn her, because his mother didn't have any warning. His mother was taken from him, and he spent the rest of his life wondering, what if? He wasn't going to see those boys go through the same thing, so he warned Tara about Jax, and the things he had done. And for that Jax went after his life, threatening him, and setting him up.

Juices head was splitting, the voices were so loud, he didn't even hear the foot steps rounding the corner.

"Jesus man, you okay?" Tig asked, but it took a while for Juice to process the words. He nodded his head, "Fine. I just uh…" Juice started, handing twisting in the direction of the puddle of vomit next to him.

"Uh huh, c'mon, let's get you cleaned up." Tig took hold of Juices arm, and guided him back to the club house. "Prospect, go clean up the mess outside, round the corner." The young prospect just nodded his head in agreement, none of them remembering his name long enough, happened to all of them, it's why the name prospect seemed to fit every guy. They had no other name to go by, but they all listened, like obedient little dogs, maybe not all the time, and usually only doing things half right less than half the time. They would work themselves up though.

Tig sat Juice down, handed him a bottle of water, which Juice was thankful for.

"You look like shit."

Juice laughed slightly at that. If he could see himself in the mirror, he would see a pale, clammy man with red eyes. He looked like he had the flu, but he didn't, the emotions were overbearing, and it showed.

"Thanks." Juice said, a choked laugh splashing past his lips, "Same way I feel, I guess." He was quiet for a minute, while Tig leaned against the bar counter, just watching him. Juice stared off into the distance. Chibs finally made his way from the club house, where just minutes prior he and Juice sat down to talk Chibs spilling his guts with what he knew about Jax, and why he wanted Juice dead.

Chibs leaned against the table, opposite side of Juice, so he was facing his back, nothing was said, just silent words spoken between the three men. It had been a hard pill for everyone to swallow, who's side do you take? Who do you feel sorry for?

Suddenly, a familiar black Cutlass pulled into the garage, tires screeching to a halt, and everyone was on their feet and outside in seconds. Tara stepped out, with leaving the ignition on. From what Chibs could see, Abel was in the back seat in his booster chair, and Thomas must have been in the rear facing car seat next to him.

Tara made her way, in a hurry, up to the men waiting for her.

"What's the hurry, lass?" Chibs asked.

"I've been receiving death threats. Tara said, her hand shaking in front of her, with a folded up piece of paper. Chibs took it, opened it up. In black bold print it read: **Your run you die.**

* * *

Juice focused on the road in front of him, as he sped down the single lane streets of Charming, taking the fastest route back to the house he shared with Nikki. For now, Tara and the boys were safe, tucked safe and sound at the club house.

Threats, with anyone involved in the MC were taking serious. Although Jax had betrayed the club, Tara was still very much in a desperate situation, and her help, more often than not, was needed. How many times had she pulled out bullet fragments from body parts, or stitched up knife wounds, or in Tigs case, sewn up bite marks from dogs attacking his ass. There were too many times to count, and they all knew they needed Tara, family of a rat bastard or not, they would protect her and the boys until they found out who wrote threatened her, and that meant girlfriend, wife or child needed protection. Teller Morrow was officially on lock down, no one leaves without it being approved first, and no one came in unless otherwise authorized by Chibs.

The rule was, you don't ride alone, but Juice knew well enough what he needed to do in the short time frame he had to get home, and get his family packed, and back to TM. He told Chibs not to worry about him, and to stay, keep everyone safe and calm. He'd be right back.

He pulled up in the driveway of his house, cut the engine, and hurried into the house, the door slamming against the wall as he pushed it open. Juice could hear Nikki's rushed footsteps, panicked, no doubt, and sure enough as she rounded the corner, a look of concern tore at her beautiful face, then one of relief. "Baby, your home, you scared me."

Nikki stood in her place, a little taken back by the stance Juice carried. He seemed on edge, angry about something, and that made Nikki unsure, thought she knew he'd never raise a hand to her. Still, she couldn't help that small voice in the back of her head, the devil whispering in her ear. "What's wrong, Carlos?" Nikki asked, fiddling with the necklace around her neck, a lock and key Juice had given her.

"Where is Willow?" Juice asked.

"She's taking her afternoon nap. Why?" Nikki asked, as Juice charged forward, no quite running, but quickly walking. He swept her up into his arms, pushing her against the wall. Her legs lifted, wrapping around his waist with a shocked squeak. He smashed his lips against hers, his hands running over her bare thighs, she still hasn't got dressed from the time I left this morning, most likely she was sleeping too.

Juice lowered her back to the floor, so she could stand on her own two feet. He kneeled down, long enough to remove the short bed shorts she wore. Nikki focused on Juice, and pulled the white oversized shirt that belonged to Juice, over her head, and tossed it to the floor.

Juice kissed her hips, then ran his tongue down, at the same time he lifted her leg over his shoulder. And for just a brief second, their eyes met, Nikki bit her lip at the sight of fire in Juice's eyes, and her head rolled back against the wall at the feel of his tongue dancing along her clit. She moaned out his name in a whispered breath, and ran her fingers over the top of his head.

She was slick and wet, her legs shaking from the feverish licks and kisses, and then Juice plunged his tongue inside of her, fucking her like that, his eyes looking up to meet hers, and they were dark, her pupils dilated, and her lips pursed out. She was so close, she could feel her walls tightening, and she didn't want to finish like this, she wanted him inside of her, so she gently forced his head away, and grabbed the collar of his Kutte, before pulling him up to his feet.

Once again they were kissing, and she moaned into his mouth, as she tasted herself on his tongue. Her hands fumbled with his jeans, and the belt which held them up, until his pants fell to his ankles. Juice braced himself against the wall as he kicked his way out of his jeans, Nikki stroking him, while their lips locked together.

Once Juice's legs were freed of his jeans, his hands lifted Nikki up, her legs locked around his hips, and he pushed into her. Her nails digging into his shoulder and the back of his neck, which made him pull out and pound into her again, over and over. His movements were hard. Every other thrust he'd have to step forward again, since tiled floor and socks were the enemy. Nikki had to bury her face into Juice's neck, because if she leaned it against the wall, her head would smack into it from the force of his thrusts. While she rested her head in the crook of his neck, Nikki grazed her teeth over his shoulder, then pulling open mouthed kisses up the curve of his neck, until she reached that one spot on his neck right below his ear, and she bit down, hard enough to force his hips forward, and him throw his head back and to the side, enough to make him moan out her name. She flicked her tongue over the bite mark which would fade to a dull bruise in just a few hours.

Still joined as one, Juice walked to the couch, where he sat down, Nikki on top of him. His hands falling to her hips, and in a circular motion, she rode him. Their lips and tongues battled it out. His hands groping her breasts, pinching her nipples teasingly, and she grinded herself down onto his hips in return. And when they came, it was with a long groan of finally spent, pent up energy. Their bodies covered in a beautifully light, glistening sweat. Still joined together, Nikki leaned down, forearms resting on his shoulders for support, as she kissed him, this time more tenderly. The kiss was meant to say: _I love you. Thank you._ And several other little loving phrases the mind could think of.

With their foreheads pressed together, enjoying the minutes they had together, just like this, no outside world, no club, no threats, no voices in their heads, nothing, just calm, blissful serenity.

But there wasn't, until Juice opened his mouth and said in the most calm, tranquil voice he could muster, "Were on lock down. Someone threatened Tara. We need to go." But Juice made no attempt to push Nikki off him; in fact, he drew her closer, arms tightening around her waist, as he placed a loving kiss to her jaw.

They quickly dressed, and Nikki packed her bags, Juice packed Willows bag, and then scooped up their sleeping baby in his arms, and placed her into her car seat. Bags ready to go next to the door.

Juice walked back to the master bedroom, as he watched his fiancé zip up her overnight bag, and their eyes made contact. "When will this end?"

"I don't know, hopefully soon."

"But there will always be another threat, right?"

Juice sighed. He knew this was coming, because he watched it with Tara, that's another reason why she wanted Jax out of the club. She wanted him to pack up his life, take her and the boys and get the fuck out of Charming, but you can't ask a Son to leave the only life they've ever known, ask them to move away from the only family they've ever known, the only money they've ever known how to bring in. It doesn't work like that, and that was something Nikki was quickly learning.

"We don't have to say, if that's what you want. I'm just telling you, this is what I know, but you say the words, and I will do whatever it takes to make you happy, because I don't want us to be like them."

Nikki silently walked up to Juice, cupping his face in her hands, as she stood up the tips of her toes to reach his lips, she pressed a gentle kiss to his. She said nothing, as she made her way into the living room, and scooped up her daughters carrier. Juice followed behind, and picked up the bags that had been packed, and followed her to the car.

"I will follow behind you. Drive straight to TM, don't sit at a light longer than you have to." Juice said. Nikki got in the car, nodded, and buckled her seat belt.

"Nikki, I love you." Juice said, leaning against the car.

"I love you too, Carlos." Their eyes connected for a moment until the fussing in the back seat pulled them back to reality.

"I'll follow behind you." Juice said, pulling on his helmet, and mounting his Harley.

True to his word, Juice followed behind Nikki right up to the gates of TM, where one of the Prospects swung open the gate, closing it as soon as Juice pulled in. Juice took notice of the large chain that was being wrapped around the gate, and then the pad lock that accompanied it. They must have been the last ones to enter.

Chibs hurried out, greeting Nikki and the baby, before moving onto Juice. Chibs pulled Juice in for a quick hug. The hug lasted a second longer than it should have, and then Juice heard it: "Juicy boy, we need to talk."


	6. Chapter 6

**_WARNING: CHARACTER DEATH IN THIS CHAPTER!_**

* * *

 ** _Chapter Six_**

Once again, Juice and Chibs were sitting in the club house, along with Bobby. No one else was welcomed into the little meeting. The look on Chibs was one filled with nerves and unease, as the two sat waiting patiently to listen to what Chibs had to say.

Upon clearing his voice, Chibs opened up his mouth to talk. "Gemma" Chibs said, and Bobby and Juice glanced at each other, as if they should have known what Chibs meant, but they didn't. "What about her?" Bobby asked.

"She has to be the one behind the note." Chibs said, while Juice bowed his head, his arms folded across the table, like he always did. "Her husband dies, gets murdered by his own club, her son is now in prison, the only thing she's got left is those boys." Chibs started, only to be cut off by Juice, "And Tara wants out with the boys."

"Aye."

"So what am I here for?" Juice asked. This is a between the two of you, and the club.

"Juicy, I need you to get the camera working in her office. Can you do that? If I'm right about this, I'm going to need proof she's trying to keep Tara close."

"I can do that."

"I also want you to stick close to her. You were close with Clay, see if she'll open up about Tara leaving."

"Don't you think she'll be pissed at me though? It's because of me that Jax is in prison." Juice asked warily.

"Test the water with her, you'll do fine Juicy boy. She can't hurt you, Juicy, she's no part of the club anymore." Chibs said, and he was right. Even when Gemma was with Clay, or even before that when she was with John, and Jax came along, she was just an old lady. Now both her husbands were dead, and her only son was in prison. The only thing keeping her sane, knowing that she had two grandsons, and she would do anything to hold onto those boys.

Juice walked off in the direction he knew he'd find Gemma, but when he walked into the paper filled office with posters of half nude women posing on motorcycles, he found it completely empty. Well then, if she wasn't in here, he'd go find Chucky, wherever he was…. "Juicy!" Chibs called out, "Tara's gone. Chucky said that she forgot a few things, and Gemma took her to the house."

Juice's heart sank in his chest, he knew that wasn't good. Gemma had a knack for injuring people when pissed off, and he should know. He'd never forget that one time when he earned a slap across his face, her long painted nails digging into his cheek as she smacked him, never again had he got on her bad side.

Juice was on his bike in an instant, followed by Chibs, Tig, Bobby and Happy. Chibs gave orders to the prospects to watch for anything, call on a burner if they see anything suspicious, or if Gemma and Tara come back.

* * *

The front of Jax and Tara's house were lined with motorcycles, Tara's car in the driveway, and the kitchen light turned on. However that didn't stop the nauseating feeling spreading through Juices body. Chibs knocked on the door a while ago, but there was no answer, again his fist pounded on the door, and still, no answer.

"Kick it in." Chibs said, stepping aside so Juice could kick the door in, and he did so with ease. The group carefully walked through the entrance calling out Tara's name, but there was no answer, instead they were met with another sound, sobbing. When they got to the kitchen they could see why. Blood scattered everywhere, and Gemma on the floor next to Tara, blood covering Gemma's face hands and body as she sat there sobbing. Tara's lifeless body laid across from here, blood also covering her body, and mixing with a bunch of water that somehow got on the floor, but on further inspection Juice could clearly see how it had happened. The sink was full of blood stained water, Gemma must have tried to drown her while she was washing bottles. A meat fork laid blood stained, next to Tara's body, and for that moment everyone fell silent. No one dare moved.

"Juicy." Chibs said with a shaky voice, "Get her out of here. No cops."

All Juice could do was nod his head, and offered his hand out for Gemma to take, but she shook her head instead. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, she was going to take my boys away, I'm sorry." She repeated over and over again, and Juice bent forward to help Gemma up, this time, she followed him. "Call Uncer," Chibs said. This time it was Bobby who got his phone out and quickly dialed Uncer's number, telling him to come quick, and bring the truck.

But it was too late, by the time Uncer pulled up; there was another car right behind him, a police car, Eli Roosevelt. Both Eli and Uncer got out, and hurried toward the door, until Eli said: "I'm sorry Wayne, but I'm going to have to ask you to stay here, while I investigate."

The whole matter was troublesome, Uncer was completely left in the dark, all he knew was to come with the truck, and hurry up about it. Uncer waved his hands out to the side of him, a sign for Eli to go in first, as he waited on the porch.

Just a few seconds went by, before a gun was fired, and Gemma was being dragged out of the house, covered in tears and blood, her hands shaking, and Uncer's mouth dropped to the floor. "What the fuck happened?" Uncer asked, he was never one to use foul language, but when he did, it was always called for.

"Gemma killed Tara, and I killed Eli. No cops." Juice said, "We need to get her out of here, and fast."

"Jesus Christ!" Uncer said, wiping his eyes of the tears. There was too much shit for his little old heart to take. These people were like his family, the only ones that still gave a damn about him that treated him like part of their club, he had so much dirt on them, so much he didn't even want to know, but still he was always there for them, but this, asking him to take care of the woman he secretly loved and cared for, a woman who just committed murder, he felt the water covering his nose in that moment, if he didn't drown before, he might just drown now.

"Where am I going to take her?"

"Just get her away until we Chibs says otherwise." Speaking of the devil, Chibs walked out of the house, cigarette between his lips, and his head held down, the man had aged twenty years in less than fifteen minutes. "Juicy boy, you go with them, you wait for my call. I need to talk to Jax."

* * *

 ** _First I want to apologize for the long wait between updates, I've had a lot going on this week. I've had two pets pass away within two days of each other, and also my friend came from out of town so I've been pretty busy here. And I want to apologize for killing off Tara, I wasn't planning on writing it like this, but well, my fingers hand a different thought entirely, wondering what they have in store for the rest of the story... anyway review and I will update soon!_**


	7. Chapter 7

**_Alright guys, I hope this chapter isn't too confusing to make out. Basically the words in regular print are the "here and now" parts and the words in_** _"italics" **are what already happened, so don't get too confused. Sorry this is so short, I'll have a longer chapter next time. R &R and Happy Fathers day!**_

* * *

 ** _Chapter Seven_**

It was too late. Things were out of control, and Chibs didn't get to Jax in time. How was he going to explain to Jax that not only had he lost his wife, but he lost his mother too? Would Jax understand that Juice didn't have a choice in the matter? No, Jax wouldn't understand, Jax would want revenge, that's how he was, is still.

 _Juice drove through the night, every once in a while he'd glance over at Gemma who was still shaking. Her eyes red and puffy with black eye liner and mascara running down her face, she didn't look like the Gemma he'd known. This was a different Gemma, an unsteady Gemma._

 _They still had about an hour's drive until they got to their "safe point" somewhere, where no one could easily find her, or hurt her. That's what Chibs said to do, and that's what he did._

 _It was late, when they pulled into a gas station, Gemma's head resting against the cool glass window, she was sleeping. Juice got out of the truck and ran into the gas station. He'd get them a few snacks for the road, a few drinks and then they'd be off again._

 _But this time, when Juice returned, Gemma was awake, and had her gun ready. "Get in." She said._

 _"Gemma, what are you…"_

 _"Shut up, and get in." She yelled. Juice knew better than to argue with her, so he got in, closed the door, and sat perfectly still._

 _"Chibs gave me an address to a place that can keep you safe. Jax is probably going to get out of prison soon, and he's going to want you dead. I'm here to help, I'm not going to hurt you." Juice said in the calmest voice he could muster._

 _"Take me back."_

 _"What? No, Gem. I can't."_

 _"Take me back. I want to go back. I need to see my boys."_

 _"Gemma, do you realize you just murdered their mother? There's police everywhere looking for you. You can't go back."_

 _Gemma pushed the gun into the side of Juices head, and he stiffened up, "I suggest you do exactly what I say, because I'm not in the mood to play around Juice."_

 _Juice sighed, and started up the engine, and he drove. He drove through the darkness of the desert night._

"Chibs!" Juice cried through the phone.

"Juice?" Chibs called out, but the sobbing and crying was overpowering his own voice.

"Chibbie, I… I didn't want to. I had to. She made me do it."

"Juicy boy, calm down. I can't understand you when you're like this. Good, now tell what happened?"

 _"Pull over right here." Gemma said, pointing to the side of the road next to a mountain side._

 _"Why?" Juice asked._

 _"Just pull over." Gemma demanded. Juice obeyed, pulling over into the dirt, the sudden change from pavement to dirt and rock made the truck tires shirt, and dirt flew up making a dark cloud of dust around them._

 _Gemma got out of the truck. This gave Juice plenty of time to reach for the small hand held that was kept hidden under the driver's seat. Piney put it there, as a just in case. Juice quickly tucked it into his pants before Gemma moved over to Juices side, opening the door, as she demanded him to get out too._

 _"No, Gemma." He said, but she waved the gun in his face, and he got out. "No one is going to stop me from seeing my boys. I know I'm as good as dead now, once Jax gets a hold of me, he'll kill me, but before that I'm going to see my boys." She held her gun steady, and then shots were fired. Juice went down, his leg was hit, but he also hit her. She lay bleeding a few feet away from him. His eyes went wide as he thought of Myles. It was the same thing, only this time, once again he killed a woman. This time, he didn't do anything wrong, he followed orders, he was trying to keep her safe, but she didn't want that. She was going to kill him, leave him on the side of the road, and what? Go back to TM? Take the boys, and leave? No, he did the right thing this time._

"You did good Juicy." Chibs said, pulling the younger man into him for a hug. Juice still beat himself up over it, because in his mind, he killed their queen, Jax killed the king, and the prince was in jail, working on getting released. When he did, would he go after Juice?


	8. Chapter 8

**_Hey my wonderful readers! Sorry for the delayed update, but here it is, longer then the last! Yay! So hope you enjoy the emotional roller coaster that is going on in this chapter. Let me know, also to the guest reviewer that asked about a Juice/Paige fanfic, I will try to come up with something, and see where it goes. Should be interesting! And to everyone else who is reading this story and to everyone who is reviewing I just want to say thank you so much, you guys really are wonderful and patient. I really love seeing what you guys have to say so keep those reviews coming in, and I'll try to update more often, if not at least once a week. :)_**

* * *

 ** _Chapter Eight_**

Juice sat in his daughter's room. Willow lay in her crib that was set up in the corner, she was sleeping. Tonight he'd finally be able to, once again, sleep in his own bed. However happy he was to be home, there was still so many unsettling thoughts that ran through his mind. The first major one, looking at his sleeping baby girl was: this wasn't the life he wanted her to know.

He understood why Tara wanted out. He couldn't, and didn't, blame her for trying to do the right thing, and that was get those boys out of Charming, far away, far from the club life that she knew, far from the crime that happened, and far, far, far away from Jax and Gemma.

For the first time he understood the poison that seeped through the cracks. Gemma was the poison, the one pulling the strings, Jax was those strings, and the rest of the club, including Juice, was the puppet that made it all happen. He was disgusted with himself, how did he call Clay and Gemma family at one point, had called Jax his brother, laid his life on the line more than a handful of times for that whole family, and would happily die for any of them, not anymore.

Nikki leaned in the door way, a shirt two sizes too big for her and a pair of black panties was all she wore. Her hair in wet curls dripping down her back and shoulders. Juice stood up, and walked over to her, and for a moment they just stayed like that, staring into each other's eyes in the darkness of their daughter's nursery. Then, Nikki took his hand, and led him to their bedroom. The lights were turned off, but they didn't need them to know where they were going.

When they reached their bedroom, Nikki stopped and turned around. Still in darkness as she eyed Juice, and pulled him out of his Kutte. Juice stood there, allowing Nikki to do all the work, he was simply exhausted, mentally and physically. His mind was on a never ending roller coaster, and he couldn't get the conductors attention to let him off. Nikki knew though, she knew how to ease his mind, and take out some of that tension, and so next she pulled his shirt off. She could just make out the curve of his stomach muscles in the moonlight through the blinded window, and couldn't help but reach out and run her hand over his stomach. Juice looked down and her hand, although he couldn't see anything except pitch black. Still, he placed his hand over hers, and pulled her in, cupping her face in his rough hands, and leaned down capturing her lips in his. Her hands help onto his wrists for support, as she stood on the tips of her toes to reach him.

His hands fell, losing Nikki's grip, and rested against the hem of the shirt she wore, which was his own. Her thigh was cool and silky smooth against his rough calloused fingers, complete opposites, but perfectly matched. He dragged his fingers along her body, bringing her shit up, up, up, until he was pulling it over her head, and discarding it on the floor next the shirt he was wearing. She was left in her blank panties.

Their tongues twisted together, deepening the kiss, and their hands roamed each other's bodies, as if it were the first time they were touching, exploring each other all over again. Nikki's hands reached the coolness of the belt buckle, and fiddled with it until it came loose. Then she slowly unbutton his jeans, and pulled down the zipper, and her hands were pushing his pants and boxers down. His member was freed, and it bobbed straight out in front of him proudly, before resting against her hip bone, as he backed her up to the bed, where they fell backwards on top of each other.

Tonight wasn't a night for foreplay. Tonight was one of those nights were you just had to start the show. The long days that had been separated, and the nights that had been taken up with music playing and laughing from the other SAMCRO members put a real damper on a couple's sex life, not to mention when your baby is sleeping right next to you. This had been the first time they were intimate since the whole thing happened.

And as soon as Juice pulled her panties down, tossing them who knows where, he positioned himself back over her. Her legs opened wide for him, and he slowly guided himself inside her. For a moment he paused, deep inside her, she moaned, flicking her tongue along the shell of his ear, and he pressed a soft kiss to her neck. He pulled out slowly, and pushed back in, her pelvis pushing upwards to meet his thrusts. Slow and deep at first, just the way she liked it, she was able to feel him more that way, and she savored the moment. Her hands trailed their way down the middle of his back, following that fine line right down, until she was running her hands over his ass, and back up again.

Their bodies were on fire, fireworks above them, a full moon underneath the stars, that's what their love was like, and no one could touch it, no one.

Juice licked the curve of her neck up to her ear, "Come for me baby, I'm so close, come for me." He begged her. His thrusts were slow, deep and hard, all at the same time. Every time their hips met each other's, Juice would grind his hips into hers, making her moan, and her head roll to the opposite side. She was pure beauty, as her body glistened with sweat. And as if on command, her body tightened up. Her back arched up off the bed, and her legs wrapped tightly around his waist. She latched onto Juice, as if her whole life depended on it, her face buried in the crook of his neck, as their reached their climax together.

Out of breath, and exhausted from the day's events, Juice collapsed next to Nikki, pulling her in for a kiss, and their eyes drifted shut.

* * *

The following morning was nothing like the night before. The tension between Juice and Nikki was almost too much to bear.

Juice stood, leaning against the counter in the kitchen, arms folded across his chest, his head bowed down, not wanting to look Nikki in the eyes.

Nikki was sitting in the kitchen, Willow in her highchair, as she held spoon full apple cinnamon oatmeal up to Willows mouth. Willow took the spoon into her eager mouth, and slammed her little fists against the highchair table in pure enjoyment, completely oblivious to her parents' emotions.

"Please, say something?" Juice begged. He hated quiet, a life with no noise, a life with no one, a quiet lonely life, was something that haunted his dreams every night. He was terrified of his own thoughts, and when he was left alone for more than a few hours at a time, he'd have this nervous twitch about him. He despised those bastards in his head. It would get even worse when someone ignored him.

Chibs had learned this very quickly about Juice. The kid would take literally anything you dished out to him, as long as he had some type of communication. Chibs remembers the beats he'd dished out to him when he first came here, it never settled well in his stomach. Why the boy did what he did. To get a rise out of him, that's what he learned later on. He'd also learned that's why he broke the law. He couldn't get any attention at home, so when he took to the streets, and still no one paid him any mind, he might as well push the limits and see what it would take to get that rise he was also searching for. And when he finally got it, after shop lifting a twelve pack of beers at the age of sixteen, and was sent off to juvie, he did his time, however once back on the streets he was right back at it.

It had taken a lot out of Chibs to get the lad to where he is today, and Chibs was quite proud of himself, all that hard work had paid off. Although he might not always show it, Chibs was proud of him, he saw him as the son he never had, just like Juice saw Chibs as the dad he never had.

"What do you want me to say, Carlos? You want me to sit here and tell you to go? That I'm okay with it, well babe, guess what? I'm not okay with it." Nikki said, agitated, still shoveling oatmeal into her daughters mouth, only this time she was spitting most of it back out, so Nikki wiped her mouth with the cloth, and unstrapped her baby whom was caked in sticky food, and carried her to the sink, where she washed her up.

Juice followed Nikki into Willows room, since her clothes were also covered in baby food, Nikki would have to change them.

"Why can't you understand it's not that I _want_ to go over there, I have to go over there?" Juice said, pulling out a diaper, wipes, baby powder, and a pink baby outfit.

"Because Carlos… Just tell me why you "have to go over there"? Nikki asked, air quoting Juices words.

"Jax is getting out of prison soon, and when that happens, he's coming after me. I killed Gemma, I had no choice."

Willow was now fully changed and redressed. Nikki placed her on the floor where she was currently chewing on a baby rattle. Nikki sighed, wiping her forehead of the imaginary sweat that was forming, and placed her hand on her hip, as she looked Juice in the eye, waiting for him to continue.

"Jax went to Tully or Tully went to Jax, I don't know which one, or who to believe anymore. The one thing that I need to know is why? Why me? It was always me, and I need to know why. I need to know if I stand a chance against Jax, or if he wants to kill me."

"Baby you know I've done nothing but support every single decision you have made. I have trusted you one hundred and ten percent with this club thing, but right now, I don't see how it's good anymore, if it was ever good. There's been so much shit since we've come back… And now you think your life is at risk, and if that's true then you're not only endangering yourself, but you're endangering Willow and me too. Let's just go. Can't we just go somewhere else; we can pack up the house, and just leave.

"Is that what you want to do, go?" Juice asked. Willow was now on her stomach, attempting to slide across the floor, reaching for a toy that was just slightly out of reach. She kicked her little legs, and every once in a while, she'd rest her head against the floor before picking it back up again, and trying to reach it again.

"Yes, that's what I want."

"Then we can go, but I have to finish this first, because if I don't know matter what or where I go, Jax will find me. I have to get this done before Jax gets out."

"God dammit Juice." Nikki sighed, as she scooped her daughter up into her arms. Willow instantly started crying, startled at the sudden movement.

"Nikki, wait, please."

"What are you going to do when Jax gets out? If you think, or you know he's going to come after you, threatening your life, why not go to the police and tell them you are afraid for your life?"

Juice sighed, and leaned against the wall, maybe all of this was too much to ask of his fiancé, she had to know what he was getting into, and he tried to tell her before they came back. Things were just out of control, and there wasn't anything he could do to change that. He had to just roll with the punches, and see what happened, and when the time was right, he'd throw them right back.

"No cops, they don't understand us, and they don't want to help us."

"What about Uncer? He's a cop, he's a good cop, and he's a friend, tell him!"

"I'll tell him, okay, I'll tell him baby, but just… I just… I want you to know that I have to do what I have to do. That also means that I will do what it takes to keep my family safe, and that means keeping me safe as well, because I'm not leaving you, I promised you that, and that's not fair for Willow either."

"What does that mean?" Nikki asked, shaking her head. Willow on her hip, she gave a small yawn and rested her head against Nikki's shoulder

"It means I have to kill Jax before he kills me."


	9. Chapter 9

**_Who doesn't like a little Juice and Tully action... no you perverts not like that :P R &R please! _**

* * *

**_Chapter Nine_**

Juice leaned against his motorcycle, chewing his lower lip, and picking at the cuff of his hooded jacket, which sat underneath his Kutte.

When Willow was born he had quit smoking, but if he had a pack right now, he'd be half way through it. His nerves were on edge, but he tried not to let it bother him much. Easier said than done, especially after the morning he had with Nikki. What he wouldn't give to take her up on her idea, and just leave everything behind, let someone else fix things, but that's not how he played, that's not how any of them played. He was man enough to stay and deal with his problems, fix them, and carry on, and that's exactly what he was going to do.

Juice was sweating just slightly, just enough for him to notice it on his brow, and he wiped it away with the back of his hand. Funny, he remembers walking through the double doors to get in to the prison, remembers going up to the desk, and speaking to the woman at the desk, and remembers a guard, but he doesn't remember walking down the hallways, or the guard opening the room door, doesn't remember sitting down, and doesn't remember waiting, or the door opening again, or Tully being brought in the room. But here he was, sitting right in front of him. Tully, ha! What the hell did my mom see in this guy? What did she see in any of the guys she brought home?

"Just bang on the door when you're done. Someone will come in." The prison guard said, as he left the room. Tully secured to the chair and table so he couldn't do anything. His hands folded together on top of the table, as he leaned in close. His lips pressed together, making them seem smaller than they actually were, that was until he opened his mouth to talk, "Hello Juan Carlos. Honestly, I have to tell you, I thought you would have already come to see me, I'm surprised it took you so long."

"I… I've had some things…" Juice found himself answering to him, just like he did when he was a child. Tully tilted his head slightly to the side whiling look into Juices eyes. Tully could read him like an open book, he was conflicted, confused, and ultimately, he was afraid. He knew that look, it was the same look Juice gave when he was a little boy, that look he saw when he killed he killed Juices mother.

"How's the baby?" Tully asked, and instantly Juice perked up, his brows furrowed together, and he leaned in close. "You don't get to ask me about my family, they are off limits to you." Juice growled through clenched teeth. Tully sat back in the chair, as much as he could with his hands cuffed to the table.

"Wow, Juan Carlos Ortiz grows a pair." Tully said with a smirk on his face. "Let's cut the crap, why are you here?" Tully asked, once again leaning into the table.

"Jax is getting out soon."

"Ahh, yes, the pretty boy is getting out, and you killed his mother. He's very upset with you for that. He wanted to be the one to pull the trigger. He wants to make you pay for that… Juice." Tully said, his smirk turning into a smile.

"Why did Jax come to you? What were his intentions?" Juice started questioning, the sooner he got his answers, the quicker he could get the fuck out of here.

Juice's eyes flicked up to the corner of the room where the camera was mounted to the ceiling, he had to be careful, he couldn't say the wrong thing, he had to be careful here.

"Don't worry, they aren't on. I paid for this room. We're alone." Tully sat back, he didn't say anything, just eyed Juice up. "You look so much like your mother, you know that? You have her chin, her lips, her nose… Her eyes." Tully licked his lips then, which sent a child right up Juices spine. "Just answer the question."

Tully's jaw tensed up, and his lips pursed together even tighter than before. It didn't last long, with his foot wiggling under the table, the chains clinking together. Tully cracked a smile, his tongue darting out to wet his dried cracked lips. "That's new, but then again it's not. You've always been a little hard ass, at least tried to be."

Juice kept a straight face, and although his mind was screaming at him to get up and walk away or to reach across the table and smack Tully, he reframed from both, and waited. Finally Tully gave in with a sigh, and a flick of his tongue over his teeth, "Jax wanted it to look like a hate crime. I didn't know who you were at first, when Jax called you by the name "Juice" I wasn't thinking about the little boy that I helped raise, Juan Carlos. It wasn't until he showed me a picture of you. He said that you were the only guy in the club that wasn't "white"."

"Did he tell you why he wanted me dead?"

"He said you did the club wrong, and he needed to keep it quiet from the guys. That's why he came to me. He knew I'd have no problem doing it."

"Why didn't you then?"

Tully sat back in the hard plastic chair, staring at Juice for a moment before answering. "I knew as soon as I saw the picture he handed me, it was you in your Kutte, sitting on your bike. I knew as soon as I saw you, who you were. I only went along with Jax's plan, I had no intentions of hurting you, I just wanted to see you."

"Why?"

"You were the exception to the rule."

"What does that even mean?"

"I couldn't hurt you even if I wanted to. Regardless of your skin color, I couldn't do it. There's still part of me that things… maybe, I guess." Tully shook his head, "I know it's true though. Parents know, but I never left you. I never abandoned you or Emily. If the cops didn't get involved I would have raised both of you."

"So why take the mother of my child, why not just take me, since that was the plan."

"Jax planned it. He said you guys travel in pairs always, doesn't matter. He said the only way to get you to leave by yourself is to do it this way. I made sure Nikki was taken care of, I didn't hurt her. I like her, Juice, you did good." Tully said, "What did you do, Juan?"

"I accidently killed a brother. I didn't want to it was just an accident. I couldn't tell the club, they would have killed me, ha ha, so I tried too…"

"God damn."

"After I tried and failed to hang myself, I came clean to Jax, he told me there was a way I could make it up to him. I had to kill a grieving mother. Her son killed a bunch of kids at a school, killed a couple teachers, and used one of our guns. She wasn't listening or cooperating with us, so Jax gave me a syringe told me to give her some drugs, she was a user, then told me to suffocate her, make it look like she overdosed."

When Juice finished explaining the story he leaned back in his chair, eyes filled with tears, and took a deep breath.

"Fuck, Carlos." Tully said with a laugh, "And I thought my situation was fucked up." He laughed again.

Juice ignored Tully's remark and flew out of his seat, knocking it backwards, and threw himself against the door, pounding on it: "Open the door. We're done in here!" Juice yelled.

"C'mon Juan Carlos, sit down and let's talk a bit more."

"No, were done Tully. You are dead to me. We are done!"

"I saved your life, more than once, I took care of you, I protected you."

"You killed my mom!"

"She wasn't the only one, JC. I've been killing your mom over and over and over again. Looking for the same woman constantly, someone that looks like her, someone that acts like her, it's not an easy job to do, but it makes me feel good, alive. You know that feeling too, don't you _Juice?"_ Tully's smile only widened, and Juice stood there, horrified as he waited for the guards to come open the door for him. Soon there was a loud buzzing noise, and the door opened, and the two guards stepped to the side allowing Juice to exit first.


	10. Chapter 10

**_Hey guys, Happy July Fourth!_**

 ** _First I just want to apologize if this chapter feels a bit rushed, I literally just finished it and I wanted something out for July fourth. Also this whole Juice/Tully thing is really interested to me, I'm thinking about doing a prequel, basically Juice as a little boy with his sister, and Tully and their mom, and showing what really happened. What do you guys think of that? Should I do this? Let me know. Also, next chapter will be better, I promise. :)_**

 ** _Love you guys, you really are the best!_**

* * *

 ** _Chapter Ten_**

Juice couldn't concentrate; his mind was on overdrive as he sped through the streets of Charming, currently on a not so busy highway, as fast as he could. The conversation with Tully on repeat in his mind, mainly, just the last part. _"You know that feeling too, don't you Juice?"_ What did he mean by that? Did he think because he's killed people he felt some sort of rush? Like he got off on killing like Tully did? No, he wasn't like that, he'd never be like that. He hated killing, he hated the blood, he hated the feeling of taking a life, a life that belonged to a mother and father, a son or daughter, a wife or girlfriend or husband or boyfriend. It was just something that came with being in an MC, you killed to protect the club and your brothers. He never wanted to do any of it, not the killing that was more Tig and Happy's thing. So why did Tully's words bother him so much if he knew how he felt inside? All that mattered was that he himself knew his heart, and Nikki knew too.

Not even an hour later, Juice pulled into his driveway, the outside porch light on awaiting his return. When he walked into the house it was chaos. The smell of spoiled milk and vomit filled his lungs, and he gaged. Soon, a horrible cry pierced his ears, and he followed that cry into the bathroom, where he found Nikki and Willow. Nikki hadn't even noticed Juice come home, she was too busy taking care of a clearly sick Willow.

"What happened?" Juice asked, taking over Nikki's position over the tub where she held Willow in the bathtub water.

"It started a little after lunch time, she didn't want to eat anything, and she was real clingy and cranky. She wanted her bottle, then shortly after that she threw up, it was so much. She spiked a fever and I've been forcing liquids down her throat, and medicine hoping to break the fever, but it keeps going up and down. I thought maybe giving her a bath would settle her down, she hasn't slept the entire day, and she's so tired." Nikki said. Juice wasn't sure who was more warn out, Nikki or their daughter.

"I'm sorry I wasn't here to help you." Juice said, taking the soft pink baby wash cloth and dragging it gently over his daughters head. The water rolled down the back of her head, and down her shoulders and arms, and she shivered slightly, although the water was warm.

"I know you're busy, and you're here now." Nikki said, leaning down, and placing a kiss on the back of Juices neck.

"Go shower or relax or something. I'll take care of Willow."

Nikki thanked Juice, and decided to go shower, because she too was covered in baby puke, and she was exhausted. She just needed a small break, then she would clean the kitchen and living room up.

Juice finished bathing his daughter, and wrapped her up in a large soft purple towel and dressed her. He then laid her over his heart and softly hummed in her ear. She was completely relaxed, and soon enough her little exhausted eyes drifted shut, and she was sleeping. Juice put her in her crib, and shut the door half way, so she wouldn't be disturbed by any noise throughout the house.

Juice found Nikki doing the dishes, her hair wrapped up in a towel, and she wore a pair of his boxers and one of his tee's.

"I think I'm going to have to start buying more clothes." He joked, lacing his arms around her waist and pulling her back into him. "You smell so good."

"Thank's babe." She said, but pulled away, "I just need to finish this real quick."

"Leave it."

"What?"

"Just leave it for tonight. I'll take care of it." But when Nikki still protested, Juice picked her up, slung her over his shoulder, and ran down the hallway into their bedroom.

"C'mon," Juice said, landing a playful smack to Nikki's behind, "Lay on your stomach, I'll rub your back." Before Juice finished his sentence, Nikki was flat on her stomach, arms stretched over her head, arms dangling off the bed. Juice laughed at the sight, placing a soft kiss to her shoulder blade, as his thumbs started working the knots out in her neck.

"So how did it go with Tully?" Nikki asked.

"Weird, I guess. I don't know. I feel like he's in my head, and I can't really get him out."

"Is that good or bad?"

"He killed my mom."

"He also loved you, and took care of you and your sister." Nikki argued. "Don't you think maybe between those two things you're bound to have a little tug of war going in your head."

"You're right." Juice said. "It's weird though, he isn't even my real dad, but he still took care of me, why? It's just crazy, I feel like I have so many questions to ask him, but at the same time I feel bad for wanting to ask him. Does that make sense?"

Nikki rolled over, Juice straddling her hips. "I think it's perfectly normal for that kind of situation. I mean, it's not like he wanted you dead, he was protecting you in his mind. He played a hand in raising you, and protecting you. He killed your mom, yes, but at the same time, he did the right thing. He made it right. He did his time."

"I feel like I have these still images in my mind, that's all I have left of her. I don't know if she was a good mom or not. I don't remember the sound of her voice, or the way she used to smell, or the things she used to do for me, but I remember Tully. I remember him tucking me into bed, and I remember him holding me when I was afraid. I remember him killing my mom, and then he looked at me, and he told me it was ok. He washed his hands in the sink, and picked me up. He told me we had to go get my sister, and he took us…."

"Shhh, baby. It's ok." Nikki said, sitting up, cupping Juices face. "It's ok." She said, wiping the tears away with her thumbs.

After Juice calmed down, they laid in bed together, cuddled up next to each other. They didn't need to make love every night, they didn't even need to talk. Just holding one another like this was more than enough for both of them, and together, like this, they fell asleep.


	11. Chapter 11

**_Chapter Eleven_**

A week later and Tully had been on Juices mind most of the time. He tried to remember things about his childhood, but it was all so fuzzy. He couldn't really put a whole picture together, and it drove him crazy.

Nikki had said something about him going back and talking to Tully again. Maybe he needed it more than he thought he did. So when he told her that going back to see Tully was out of the question, she suggested something else. "Why don't you go visit your sister then?"

Visiting his sister was something he had always thought about doing, and had longed to see her. He wondered what she was like. What kind of life she had made for herself, if she was married and had a family by now, or if she was a party girl. Maybe she was neither, maybe she was a good girl and worked hard to make a living, or maybe she had fucked her whole life up just like Juice had done, and just like their parents too.

"I can't… I can't… she hates me."

"You don't know that, you guys had a fight, you were both just kids, and now you are adults living on opposite ends of the country, don't you think it's time you both grew up a little bit and talked it out?"

Nikki had a point there, but he couldn't admit it, because in all honesty he was terrified of his sister. He had been the black sheep of the family, literally, and the man he thought was his father wasn't his father. That same man hated colored people, that man was Tully. His sister was only his half-sister, and she belonged to Tully, she probably hated him just as much as Tully hated him. But Tully didn't really hate him, he said so himself.

"Babe." Nikki said, slipping onto Juices lap. She could easily see the stress on his face, and she hated it. "You have to stop worrying about this. It's not healthy. Ever since the incident you just don't' seem yourself anymore."

Nikki was right, ever since Tully waltz back in his life everything was torn apart and turned upside down. He's been second guessing things, and wondering about his life and his family. He was more unsure of himself now than he ever was.

"Maybe your right" Juice finally agreed, "but right now I need to head over to the garage, the guys are waiting on me." And with a playful slap to her behind, she was out of his lap, allowing him to get up. Juice pulled her back into him though, holding her so close and so tight her breath was forced from her body, and it didn't help the fact that he leaned in even closer to kiss her. When they finally pulled away she was desperate for air and her head was buzzing, and the room was spinning. "Wow!" She said with a laugh, "What was that for?" Juice smiled, "Because you are so amazing, and I love you."

"I accept that." She said teasingly.

Chucky had multiple rolls in the MC, even though he was not an official member; he still came in handy on more than one occasion. He was a baby sitter, a cook, the ice cream man, and currently a wedding planner and a cake designer.

"I take it Chucky is coming over today?" Juice asked, as he pulled his Kutte on.

"Yeah, he wants to go over the decoration ideas. Speaking of which, do you want to input ideas?"

"How about this, you take your ideas with Chucky today, and when I come home you can show me what you got and we'll choose them together."

"Sounds good, babe." Nikki said, as she walked Juice to the door. They shared one last kiss, and as Juice took a step out the door, Nikki gave her fiancé a little smack on the ass. He quickly turned around and eyed her with a crooked smile.

"That was for earlier." Nikki said.

"Consider this war." Juice said, nodding in her direction. Nikki laughed, and turned just slightly wiggling her ass in front of him. "Challenge accepted."

* * *

In the week since seeing Tully, Chibs had kept a close eye on Juice. The kid had been through a lot, and now with a new family to take care of, plus club business, and now his past coming back to bite him in the ass, Chibs wasn't sure if he could handle it or not.

"Hey Juicy." Chibs greeted, pulling the younger man in for a brief hug.

"Hey Chiby." Juice answered back, returning the hug. "You think I can talk to you for a minute?" Juice asked shyly.

"Course, what's wrong lad?" Chibs asked, taking a seat outside next to Juice. He pulled out a cigarette waiting for hear whatever it was the kid had to say.

"I've been thinking about Tully a lot lately, the fucker won't leave my head."

"Aye, I've noticed."

"I…I think I should go see my sister. I mean… after this whole Jax thing is taken care of."

"Listen Juicy, you don't have to do this. We can take care of it."

"No, I need to clean up my own messes from now on. Jax is one of them."

"Juicy boy, you say the word and you know Hap will be just fine taking care of it."

"Thank's Chibs, but no, I have to do it."

"Juicy, we didn't want to tell you right away, but I think you should know. Jax is getting out a few days early."

"What? How early?"

"Tomorrow."

* * *

Tully sat in his opened cell, a picture of Juan Carlos and Alice together as children. They were happy kids, and Tully smiled to himself at the memory of taking that photo. They looked exactly like their mother, both with tan skin, and the same brown eyes. Actually, their mother had green eyes, but they both had brown. At first that was something Tully was incredibly proud of, especially after Juan's eyes changed from that baby blue color to brown. He remembered how proud he was, that his son had his eyes. Tully felt like a fool, even now to think back on that memory. He should have seen it before, except the kid didn't look at all black; then again, Alice didn't look white either. Only one thing was certain, they both looked exactly like their mother, and that was one parent that didn't need DNA questioning.

He wasn't sure if he was happy to be in contact with Juan Carlos again, or if he was angry for the past. It wasn't the kid's fault, that's why he killed his mother. If he got away with the murder he wouldn't have turned his back on the kid, no way, he had been there and raised him, hell he called him _"Daddy."_

In that moment he missed his daughters voice, and he wondered what she was doing in that moment. Although it would be easy to find out, all he had to do was make the call, he promised himself when he was inside he wouldn't do that to her. It was hard enough getting to talk to her when he wasn't doing time inside.

The one most important thing in Tully's life was his children, even though by blood he only had one, but no matter what he counted Juan Carlos as his own. Somehow, he had to prove to him that he wasn't a bad guy. He wanted to be able to come over and see his grandchild. Fuck, him a grandfather! He frowned. He had hardly even been a father. He had to fix that, and he knew exactly how he'd do it.

* * *

 _ **MY LOVELIES! How is everyone? Hope you all enjoyed this update. I am getting sooooo excited, not sure how many more chapters this is going to have, but I can tell you it will start to wind down soon. So let me know what you guys think about Juice visiting his sister, and what about Tully making it right with Juice. What do you think he has planned to fix their relationship? Family reunion in the future or no, thoughts? I'll update again soon, love you guys! R &R**_


	12. Chapter 12

**_Chapter Twelve_**

When Juice returned home it was only after Chucky showed up at Teller Morrow with a notebook that had yellow sticky notes sticking out of the sides. A smile plastered to his face gave Juice the satisfaction that his wife to be was presumably happy. "How'd it go with Nikki, Chucky?" Juice asked, slamming back his last drink, while Tig nursed a beer as well as Bobby.

"Just peachy," Chucky answered with the same wide goofy smile that he always wore before jogging off towards his room. The guys had moved him in permanently right after the tire place up the street was broken into. Chucky had graciously "accepted that" and didn't mind the guys coming and going or the parties that were occasionally thrown keeping him awake until horrible hours of the following morning. He didn't mind, either, when he was the one left to clean up after the mess that was made, course, the prospects would help out.

"Guess I better head home." Juice said with a wide smile, earning himself several pats on the back and whistles being called.

"I'll walk you out, Juicy." Chibs offered, "Better be headin' home myself." Juice nodded, and followed Chibs out the door, waving goodbye one last time to the guys.

"What's up Chibby?" Juice asked, straddling his bike, as he looked up at the fatherly figure that was Chibs.

"We'll be back here tomorrow at eight o'clock sharp. I want to be at Stockton by nine for Jax's release at ten."

"I know Chibs, we already discussed it." Juice said. Sometimes he felt like his was still a child, with their parents repeating the commands until the disobedient child finally decided to listen.

"I know lad, but I just wanted to let you know…"

"I know, Chibby, I know I don't have to. I know I can stay home. I know I don't have to face him, but you're all wrong, I do need to face him. It's the only way I can put this all to rest, once and for all."

Chibs nodded in understanding, and pulled Juice in for a hug, and with a quick kiss to his cheek, and a hardy smack to his back, Chibs sent Juice off, watching Juice ride out of the yard until he couldn't be seen anymore. Tomorrow was going to be a busy day.

* * *

The guys had no intention of letting Jax out of their sight. As soon as he walked out of those prison gates he would be accompanied back to Teller Morrow, they would have a few drinks, and they would allow Juice to do what he needed to do to get even.

They currently had a countdown going, only twenty more minutes to go before Jax was released from Stockton. They had already been waiting there for about forty minutes. Juice was starting to trudge a whole in the ground from pacing so much. The rest of the guys sat or leaned against their bikes with the exception of Rat who was currently sitting in their black van. Rat would be the one to drive Jax back.

"Juicy, would you sit the fuck down." Chibs said, raising his voice just slightly. Juice gulped down the lump in his throat, and sighed, taking a seat on his bike. They continued to wait for Jax's release. However, after another thirty minutes and there was no sign of anyone coming out of the front double gates, the entire crew became a little unnerved.

"How much longer do you think we'll have to wait?" Bobby asked, wiping the sweat from his brow.

"Dunno." Chibs answered honestly, "Give it another five minutes and if there is nothing, then we'll go inside and see what's going on."

Five minutes had passed without incident, not even so much as a guard or prisoner walking the yard. It was too quiet for their liking, and that's when Chibs spoke up: "Well I'm not waiting anymore Bobby, Tig, Juicy you coming in?"

They all answered back with a nod or a "yes" and the four of them walked into the main part of Stockton.

A woman with grew hair and thick glasses smiled up at them, "May I help you?" Her name was Rose. She was one of those people that should have retired years ago, but loved the job to damn much –for whatever reason- to leave the job.

"Yeah, we are waiting to pick up one of our friends. He was supposed to be released about fifteen minutes ago. We want to know what the hold up is."

One of the guards stepped up, hands of his thick hips, as he peered over Roses shoulder to make sure everything was going smoothly. "What's your friend's name?" The guard asked.

"Jackson Teller." Chibs replied.

Rose leaned back in her chair, and the guard let his head fall to his chest. "Someone was supposed to contact you this morning. Things have been a little chaotic, so it doesn't surprise me that no one followed through with that request." The guard said.

"What happened?" Tig asked, waving his hand in the air, as if to secretly say "get on with the story already."

The guard looked each one of them in the eye, trying his best to find the right words. "I'm sorry to inform you of this, but..."

* * *

 ** _Soooo... I just cut it off there, I know, I suck lol. So what do you think happened? I want to hear everyones thoughts on this. Lets see how many reviews I can get, and I will post a new chapter tomorrow night!_**


	13. Chapter 13

**_Alright guys, just a quick note here, thank you for everyone who commented on the last chapter. I just quickly finished this chapter just now, hope you all like it... be warned there is a LOT of sadness about to happen. Don't say I didn't warn you... btw there will be more of my rambling at the end, enjoy the chapter :)_**

* * *

 ** _Chapter Thirteen_**

The guard looked each one of them in the eye, trying his best to find the right words. "I'm sorry to inform you of this, but your Jackson Teller was found dead in his cell early this morning."

* * *

The news of Jax's death was a hard pill to swallow. They didn't know exactly what had happened or when it all occurred, all the guard could tell them was that Jax was found dead in his cell early in the morning, his sheet tied in a knot around his neck. He had been on his knee's leaning forward.

Bile rose up in Juices throat, and he knew somehow Tully was involved, he couldn't prove it, nor did he want to but he knew.

"Let's go Juicy." Chibs said, taking hold of Juice by the arm, but Juice didn't or couldn't move. His body was stiff as a board, and tears welled up in his eyes, he wanted to at least talk to him one last time, let him know that he was going to meet Mr. Mayhem, do it the right way, not like this. "No." Juice said, softly, but that went ignored by Chibs, whom slipped his arm around Juices waist and tugged him towards the door. "I said no!" Juice said, breaking free of Chibs grip, he was shaking with hurt and rage and relief. "I need to see Ron Tully."

"Alright sir," The woman said, clicking a few things into the computer in front of her, her glassed pushed up against her face and her lips pursed together, "When would you like to set it up?"

"As soon as possible… today," Juice said, tapping his finger against the dirty counter.

"I'm sorry sir, but we are not allowing any visitations today. Standard procedure for when something like this happens."

"Juicy, let's go. It's done now, you can move on." Chibs said, whispering low so no one would hear, but Juice ignored Chibs again. "Tomorrow then."

"Tomorrow morning, you are the first visit of the day, ten a.m." The woman said, smiling up at Juice. Juice didn't return the smile, only turned on his heel and walked out without the help of Chibs.

Chibs was so focused on keep Juice in check he had forgotten about Bobby and Tig, who stood quietly behind him. They looked just as shocked as he probably did. Tig's eyes teared up, and Chibs could have sworn he saw them spilling over his cheeks, but he didn't say anything. One thing was clear, Jax would have never killed himself, someone else had done that for him, and if Chibs knew Juice and the reason for wanting to sit with Tully again, it was because he had something to do with killing Jax.

* * *

"Where's Jax?" Rat asked, his legs dangling out the side of the van. Tig and Bobby walked out with their heads down. Chibs was watching Juice very closely, and Juice looked like he could hurt someone or just burst into tears at any given moment.

The whole atmosphere changed as soon as Chibs, Tig Bobby and Juice came out, and the rest of the guys knew it wasn't good. Happy stood up, legs shoulder width apart, arms at his side, he truly looked like a soldier ready for combat, dare anyone get in his way, he'd take them down without question.

Chibs shook his head, quietly answering Rat's question, but no one seemed to pick it up. "Jax is dead. Found him this morning sometime, strangled by his sheet." Everyone went quiet, shocked at the news. He would have ended up dead anyway, but it was the fact that it happened the way it did, and even more troubling was the fact that Jax would have never even thought about suicide, he just wasn't that sort of man.

* * *

The rest of the day went by hellishly slow, everyone was in a daze. Back at the club house everyone just spent the day sitting down, not talking just silently thinking about the morning's events.

Juice found himself wondering if he would have been able to go through with killing Jax, or if he would have backed out. The way he was feeling right now with the news of Jax's death brought new feelings to the surface, and he found himself mentally recalling the good times they had together. Jax wasn't so bad to start with. He had changed after he took the gavel, the fucking thing changes a person, it changed Clay and look what happened to him. He only hoped that Chibs wouldn't go down that road or any other future presidents for that matter.

Juice stood up first, "I…I'm going… I have to go home." Juice said, mumbling to himself, tears threatening to spill over his eyes, but he fought them back. Reguardless of all the shit Jax put them through, Juice wasn't a cold heartless person, he would have grieved Jax's death anyway, just like he grieved when Clay met Mr. Mayhem. They all grieved in their own way, Juice was just more emotional about things like this.

Chibs got up and followed Juice outside just in time to see the tears stain Juices face. Chibs stood back a minute just to watch Juice, and he couldn't help but wonder if the kid had always been this way or not. If not, then when did it all start?

Chibs let out a soft sigh, and lit up a cigarette and walked over to Juice who was sitting on his motorcycle. Chibs took a seat opposite of Juice, on his own bike, and leaned back into it, puffing out the intoxicating smoke.

"Listen to me Juicy." Chibs called out softly. Juice sniffled, but looked up. Command Juice to do something, weather his face was full of tears and snot or full of blood and bruises, command him and he will listen. "I don't want you thinkin' this is your fault. Whatever happened in there, it has nothing to do with you. Jax was going to meet Mr. Mayhem one way or another by your hand or mine, or someone else's. It just so happened to be someone else's."

"It had to have been Tully. Why does he keep doing this to me? First my mom, then he turns my sister against me, then he kidnaps my fiancé right after she gave birth, and now Jax."

"Juice, listen, we don't know for sure if it was Tully or not. The guards don't even know what happened and they were there. Go home Juicy, clear your head, and get some rest.

"Do you really think Jax would be capable of killing himself?" Juice asked as Chibs stood up.

Chibs sighed again, looking up to the sky he answered, "I don't know." He paused for a moment, thinking carefully about what he would say next, because he didn't want to offend the kid that looked up to him from the time he was handed his prospect Kutte. "I didn't peg you for the type to try that shit, and look what happened." Juices head sunk to his chest, and he felt his face heat up with embarrassment, because honestly he wasn't that person, he never was. He was the type of person to try to make the best of the situation he was given crappy or not.

"We've all been there Juice, even me. I've never talked about it before. There was a time where I was just like you, happy and carefree. Things weren't bad in the club, but I knew there would be a point in time where I'd have to spill blood to prove my loyalty. I never killed anyone before that point. My first kill, it changed me. I didn't know who I was anymore, and you have no idea how many times I sat under one of those fucking tree's in the middle of nowhere that same fucking chain you had by my side. I thought about ending it so many times, because if I didn't I wouldn't be able to sleep peacefully anymore. But I couldn't just end it, I had a family, Kerrianne… What would she think? I couldn't do it. That doesn't mean that other people are like you and me, when push comes to shove. You don't know what a cornered animal will do, so don't go making assumptions about Jax before we know what really happened."

After a few more minutes, Juice wiped his face free of tears and snot, and reeved up his motorcycle bringing it to life. He rode into the mid afternoon sun, straight to his house where he knew Nikki and Willow would be waiting for him.

Juice walked through the front door of his house, and heard playful giggling coming from the living room. And upon the door being shut behind him, he heard Nikki call out, "Babe, is that you?"

"Yeah, I'm home. I'm going to go take a quick shower."

Juice didn't bother walking into the living room, just walked straight to his bedroom, and into the bathroom that was attached to their bedroom, and striped down until he was naked.

While the water was heating up he stared at his reflection in the mirror. He looked like the guy he knew, but he didn't feel like that guy anymore. His shoulders felt heavy, and his chest felt as though it would cave in at any moment.

He sighed, and pulled out a small bag from his jean's pocket, and opened it up. There were five white round pills. Juice had been known to take a drugs every once in a while to calm down or just to have some fun, however since he met Nikki he hadn't taken any drugs, he had stopped completely.

Juice glanced at his reflection one more time in the mirror, and popped two pills in his mouth, chasing them down with water from the sink, before stepping into the warm shower. He stood under the running water, letting it flow over his body, washing away all the shit from the day, and washing Jax down with it.

After his shower, the pills hadn't yet kicked in, and he popped another two pills into his mouth. By the time he got himself dressed, wearing sweat pants and a white shirt, he started feeling the effects of the Oxy he had taken. His head was starting to feel light and his limbs were starting to feel heavy and light at the same time. The room spun around him just enough to make him feel as though he was on a carnival ride, and he smiled at the sensations his body was feeling.

"Hey babe." Nikki called out, "I'm going to drop Willow off at Wendy's. She agreed to watch her for the night so we can have a night to ourselves. I'm going to stop by the store on the way home, and I'll make us a nice dinner when I get home."

Juice forced himself to walk to the living room where Nikki was bucking Willow into her carrier. "Kay, be careful. I'm going to go lay down for a while, I'm feeling kinda tired." Juice said, and Nikki smiled up at him, pulling his face down to meet hers and they shared a quick kiss. "Okay. I'll wake you up later."

Juice bent down and placed a gentle kiss on top of his daughters head, she didn't seemed to even noticed, instead, she carried on throwing her hands around playing with the rattle she had clutched in her tiny fists.

He watched the two loves of his life walk out the front door, and into the car. He waited a few minutes more, and watched them drive away, before retreating back to his bedroom. At this point, he felt the full effect of the drugs working in his system, even feeling the intense nausea feeling, which he hated. Every little move he made he felt sick, but he knew he wouldn't throw up, his stomach was too empty for that, so he popped another pill maybe two more into his mouth, he wasn't counting at this point, he was too fucked up to even know what he was really doing anyway. His mind was completely hazed, and his eyes felt heavy. He fought to stay awake, but it was no use. He leaned against the wall, and his body slide down, his head rolled around his shoulders, and then…black.

* * *

 ** _*Coughs* Hey guys... So... what did you think? Please don't be mad at me... I did warn you up there *pints to top* this would be a sad chapter. Also, I wrote the Oxy part and the feeling based off of how I felt when I took it, and I only took it after I had my surgeries, thats how it made me feel pretty much, and yes it does become addicting, so stay away from that shit! Also review please... Does Juice live or die? Ohhhhh... whats gonna happen?_**


	14. Chapter 14

**_Hello my lovelies! Thank you all so much for keeping me alive to write this... please please don't kill me for this... it just has to be this way *cries and runs away*_**

 ** _Short update I know, but this is just a filler chapter, next one will be longer. Enjoy and Review!_**

* * *

 ** _Chapter Fourteen_**

Wendy was more than happy to watch Willow for the night. She had everything set up in the nursery, and even had her newest girlfriend, Olivia with her. Olivia was only three years older then Wendy. The two of them met at rehab, and had gone their separate ways for almost a year when they ran into each other, literally, both of their cars ended up at Teller Morrow where they were worked on and eventually fixed. Olivia and Wendy hadn't left each other's sides since that incident.

"Are you sure it won't be too much?" Nikki asked, placing the diaper bag on the corner of the couch. Abel was sitting on the floor coloring when he looked up and saw Nikki. He stood up and ran into her arm, "Aunt Nikki!" He cried out joyfully, and Nikki easily picked him up, although she pretended to falter, telling him, "Wow! You've gotten so big! You are growing so fast little man," and she ruffled his straight blonde hair. He smiled at her, and ran back to his coloring books. "How's he been doing?"

"He has his good days. He's getting better though." Wendy said. Olivia was standing next to Wendy with Thomas on her hip. He was just over a year old, and when Tomas and Willow were around each other, they played nicely together, in fact Wendy and Nikki would joke around hoping the two of them would eventually fall in love and marry. It was a dream that was far away, but they still enjoyed the thought of it.

"We'll if you're sure it's alright watching her, I better get going. Juice wasn't feeling very well when he came home. I think it was just a hard day."

"Yeah, yeah don't worry. Everything will be fine. I have your number in case something happens, which it won't." Wendy said, reassuring Nikki, and she scooped Willow into her arms with a smile on her face.

"Please don't hesitate to call if something is wrong, or if she gets too cranky."

"Honey, don't worry about it tonight. Get home to your man." Wendy said. Nikki smiled, and thanked the couple again, and let herself out.

* * *

The store had been crowded, and by the time Nikki finally loaded the groceries into her car she felt exhausted, and couldn't wait to go home so she could cuddle up with Juice and relax for a little while. She smiled to herself as she started the car. Thinking about the evening she would have alone with her soon to be husband made her that much more excited about getting home. She would make him the best most romantic dinner she knew to make, pasta with a salad, and for dessert, chocolate and strawberries and of course whip cream for the bedroom!

Nikki pulled into the driveway of her home, and felt a jolt of something through her stomach. All the lights were off, and it was starting to get dark, which was not like Juice. Usually he would at least turn the porch light on as soon as the sun was starting to set, but this time it was off along with the lights in the house.

She gathered the groceries from the trunk and hurried into her darkened house. It was quiet when she went inside, and the goosebumps raised on her arms and the back of her neck. She dropped the groceries off in the kitchen, and called out to Juice: "Carlos. Babe, you home?" She asked making her way slowly into the living room, turning on the hallway light as she did so. She noticed the light was on in her bedroom, and she smiled to herself. He must have set this up. She could bet anything right now that he was probably waiting for her on the bed at least half naked, or hiding behind the door half naked ready to scare the crap out of her before taking her into his arms and kissing her, then he would press her against the wall and take her right there. So she decided to play his game, and followed the light into the bedroom.

As soon as Nikki entered the room, her knee's buckled, and she stumbled backwards, almost falling. Her eyes instantly filled with tears, and she let out a scream, "CARLOS!" She cried out, "Wake up!" She found Juice in the middle of the bedroom floor face down, a pile of vomit laid next to him. She touched his back and shook him, yelling and pleading for him to wake up, but his body was cold, and his face was a pale blueish grey color, and she knew that wasn't good. She felt around for a pulse and couldn't find one, and she started hyperventilating. The love of her life lay next to her not breathing. She was so confused and didn't know what to do. She had been told so many times that if there was ever an emergency to never call 9-1-1.

Nikki ran into the kitchen and grabbed Juice's cell phone. Her hands shaking, making her press the wrong numbers into the phone, but eventually she got the number right, and pushed the "TALK" button, which dialed the number. The phone rang once, twice, three times, four times, finally on the fifth ring she heard Chib's voice, "Juicy boy!" Chibs called out just like he always did when Juice called or when he saw him. "Ch Ch Chibssss, Juice… He's…I need," Nikki tried, but couldn't form the words, her voice just as shaky as her hands were. However, Chibs could hear the terror in her voice, and knew instantly that something bad had happened. "What happened, Nikki?" Chibs asked, voice soft, but firm, instant even.

Nikki cried out, "He's not breathing."

"I'm on my way."


	15. Chapter 15

**_Here is another short update, sorry, I know I promised a longer chapter, but I lied. Hopefully this one will be just as good though. I thought a little throwback to Juices childhood would be a good place to go for this chapter. So I hope you all enjoy this. Also, please don't chase me *hides* LOL ok, Read and Review please, you guys are the best!_**

* * *

 ** _Chapter Fifteen_**

 _I sat down at the dining room table, my homework in front of me. I had to color a picture of my room, but I didn't want to. I hated my room, it was small, and it smelled like mold, sometimes it would even make me cough. It was noisy too since it faced the street, I could hear all the noise from the city outside, and at times it was almost impossible to sleep._

 _Alice was in the kitchen, attempting to read the instructions how to make mac n' cheese from the box, and she poured in two cups of water then poured the macaroni into the pot. "You'd get your homework done faster if you could actually look at your room while your coloring." Alice said, but I ignored her, sticking my tongue out at her while her back was turned. "I know what my room looks like, I sleep in there. I don't want to go to my room. I'm hungry and I want mom." I said, my stomach growling and my eyes filling with tears._

 _"Well mom isn't here and I don't know when she's coming back." Alice said, putting on her best big girl voice, while turning on the stove._

 _"Shut up!" I screamed, feeling completely frustrated with everything. I was tired, hungry, stressed out, angry at my mom, but worried at the same time. I hadn't thought about dad, since he had no idea mom was gone, and dad was working._

 _"You can't tell me to shut up. I'm taking care of you." Alice said, she was only three years older than me, and at eight years old, she was more mature then most girls. She really did step it up and take care of me when she had too._

 _And then, right in the middle of our fighting the front door opened, then slammed shut._

 _"What the hell is all the whining about?" It was dad, and as soon as I heard his voice I bolted from the dining chair into the living room which was basically all one big room, and attached myself to his leg._

 _"Juan, don't my hands are full." Dad said, trying to get around me, but my grip was too firm, I wouldn't let go._

 _"He's just whining because mom is gone again, and he's hungry, and he doesn't' want to do his stupid homework." Alice yelled from the kitchen._

 _"Wait, mom's gone again?" Dad asked, and I looked up at him and nodded. "She never came to pick me up from school today."_

 _"God dammit!" Dad yelled, "The fucking school never called me. I didn't know. I'm sorry sweet heart," and he kneeled down, and picked me up with one arm._

 _"What are you cooking?"_

 _"Mac n' cheese." Alice replied._

 _"Go watch TV. I'll finish cooking. I brought pizza home too so we'll have this with pizza. I'll even let you guys eat in the living room tonight since mom's not home."_

 _Later that night when it was time for bed, I looked out my bedroom window from my bed, which was on the floor right under the window. I had a perfect view of the sky, though it was light up with the city lights, but I didn't mind it. I felt my eyes burn with tears, and that burning need that every child has for their mother returned in the pit of my stomach. I missed her so much, and I wanted her to hold me and tuck me into bed, kiss me on my forehead and my cheeks like she always did at night, and tell me a story until I fell asleep._

 _Dad came in the room instead asking, "Hey, what's wrong sweetheart?" Daddy always calls me sweetheart, he calls Alice that too. "I want mommy." I cried, and wiped the tears and snot onto the back of my hand, just as Daddy pulled me into his lap. "Well mommy isn't here right now, so I guess you're going to have to settle with me. Should I start crying too?" Daddy asked, and I stopped crying, confused and looked up at him. He stared down at me for a second before throwing his head back in laughter. "Guess not." Daddy said, and I didn't say anything else to him. "You know what, son, you and Alice are my whole world. You are the man of the house when I'm not here, and your sister is the woman of the house when Mommy isn't here. Believe me when mommy is gone I miss her too. Who am I going to cuddle with at night?" Daddy asked, sounding as sad as he could. "Why do you need to cuddle, daddy? Are you afraid of the dark?" Daddy laughed, and shook his head, "No, not quite little man."_

 _"It's ok if you are, I won't tell anyone. Daddy, you can sleep here tonight, since we both miss mommy."_

 _"You're a good boy Juan Carlos. Don't you ever forget that. You're my boy, but you are so much better than me." Daddy said, kissing my forehead, before laying me down and crawling into the bed next to me, where he pulled me into his arms, and I fell asleep tucked up against his chest._


	16. Chapter 16

**_Well, let's see if Juice lives or dies... *deep breaths* Please review, thank you!_**

* * *

 ** _Chapter Sixteen_**

Nikki paced the living room, back and forth, back and forth, back and forth, until Chibs reemerged from the bedroom; sweat beading on his forehead, a look plastered on his face that she couldn't understand.

"How is he?" I asked, and I felt myself holding my breath as I waited for an answer. "He's still out of it, the guys are taking turns walking him around, we need to keep him moving, he can't rest for a while, not until he comes out of it." Chibs said. "So, he'll be ok?" Nikki asked feeling hopeful. "Aye, he'll be fine. Puked all over mine and tig's hand, he'll be fine.

Nikki let the breath she had been holding in out, and she threw her arms around Chibs's neck and his arms around her in a comforting manner.

"You should go see him, maybe if he hears your voice it will pull him out of it." Chibs offered, and Nikki nodded and stepped away, using her hands to wipe the tears that had been falling nonstop since she found Juice on the floor.

Chibs lead her into her own bedroom, holding her arm to steady her. She was still wobbly on her feet, and her head was still spinning as if she were in a dream, _"This can't be real. I'm dreaming, this isn't really happening,"_ She had said over and over again while Chibs shoved his hands down her fiancés throat. She took a deep breath when she saw Juice. Happy was holding him, forcing him to walk around, Happy was more or less dragging Juice around the room with his arm wrapped around Juices side for support. Juices head was rolling around on his shoulders, and Nikki felt disgust cross her. She had never felt like that towards the man she vowed to marry, never had this problem before. Their relationship was a happy, healthy one, sure they squabbled a bit, just like every other couple, but they always made it up to each other, tried to see everything from the other person's perspective, and they never went to bed angry at each other. Even when Juice had tried to distance himself from her in the beginning, and she had told him something about how he would never be able to do that, because they were destined to be together, _"you can't push love away, especially when it was meant to happen."_ That's what she had said when they first got together and he was having his doubts. She was the glue where he couldn't be. But that's why they were so perfect for each other, they helped each other, and they worked through everything, they protected each other, and never once gave up on each other. So what was this now? Were they falling apart? Was this the end? Why did he take so many pills? Was he this upset and I was just too busy to notice?

Fresh tears pooled in her eyes, as she watched Happy sit Juice down on the King sized bed, and forced Juice to take a few sips of water, and he did so reluctantly. Happy helped Juice to lay back down, and nodded in Nikki's direction, before stepping out of the room giving the couple privacy.

Nikki stood by the door; she couldn't make her legs move. She stood there and watched Juice, his eyes pinned; face pale, sweat dripping from his body. This wasn't the Juice she knew, wasn't the man she fell in love with, wasn't the one she wanted to marry or raise a family with. Again she let out a breath of air, her insides burning with anger, sadness, and confusion.

"Nikki." Juice called out in a sluggish voice.

"Yeah, I'm here." Nikki said, her voice shaky, and she had to breathe through the anxiety she was feeling. She walked over to the side of the bed, and sat down on the edge in front of Juices knees. There was a cold cloth in a bowl next to the bed, and she picked it up, and wiped his face with it. His eyes opened, and she sniffled at the sight of them. "I'm sorry baby. I didn't mean to." His words were slurred together, but she knew he was sorry. "You tried to kill yourself Juan, why would you do that? What about our daughter?" Nikki cried, and placed her face in her hands as she sobbed. Juices limbs still felt heavy, like they were being held down with lead, and he struggled to lift his arm up, wanting to console the love of his life, but he simply couldn't muster up the strength to do it. Instead, he managed to pull back the sheet, and said, "Lay with me."

Nikki wiped her eyes, but the tears kept coming. She kicked her shoes off, and crawled into the bed next to Juice. They embraced each other, and she continued to cry into his chest. Only when she stopped crying did Juice speak. "I didn't try to kill myself. I don't want to die. I just… sometimes things get so loud in my head. There's no off switch. Things just get louder and louder, and sometimes I can't take it. I just wanted it to go away. After the morning I had." Juice swallowed hard, his own eyes filling with tears. "Jax was found dead in his cell this morning. I was supposed to kill him. It was supposed to end with me. He would go out how he wanted to go out, with the club around him, with his friends. Not like that. I think it was Tully. I know he had something to do with it." Juice paused, remembering the dream he had, memories of his childhood flooding back to him. It was Nikki's turn to apologize, and she did. "I'm sorry babe. You should have told me."

"I wanted to but you were so happy, and you were on your way out the door anyway. I didn't want to bother you. I just lost track of how many pills I took. That's all. I never wanted to die. I just wanted the voices to shut up." Juice said, his voice sincere in his words, and Nikki believed him.

For now the two laid in each other's arms, mentally reviewing the day's events, each one wishing they had done things different. For Nikki, she wished she had paid more attention and asked more questions. For Juice, he just wished he had been more careful. He hated seeing what he put Nikki through, and how easily he could have lost his life. How would Nikki cope with that? How would she explain to our daughter years later what I did?

There was a light tapping on the door, and Nikki reluctantly lifted her head, "Come in."

Chibs walked into the room, clearing his throat, and clearly feeling awkward about walking into the room. "Hap and I are leaving. Rat said he'd stay behind, just in case anything happened. We'll be back in the morning."

"No it's ok. I think he'll be fine now. You guys can go home." Nikki said, getting out of the bed, as soon as she left, Juice was snoring. "Thank you for coming down and taking care of him the way you did. Not anyone would have done what you and Tig did."

"Yer right about that, lass." Chibs said, "If you need anything just call." Chibs leaned down, kissing Nikki on the cheek, and she hugged him in return. Happy, Tig and Rat followed Chibs out of the house, and she watched as they all mounted their motorcycles, and reeved the engines before taking off down the street to their own houses, or to the club house for a round of drinks.

Nikki headed back into her bedroom, and she leaned against the wall, listening to Juice snore, watching his chest rise and fall. Her knee's buckled and she slid down the wall, tears freely flowing down her cheeks. Sure she had cried all day, literally, but the emotion of almost losing her other half was still there. She had tried her best to hold it together while the guys were there and taking care of Juice, now that she was alone, and Juice was sleeping, she could get it all out, and she did.


	17. Chapter 17

**_Another short chapter, but full of drama... I hope. Anyways make me feel better and leave a review, both of my cats died today, and I'm feeling really sad. They were very sick._**

* * *

 ** _Chapter Seventeen_**

The next week had been strained between Juice and Nikki. They hardly spoke to each other, but maybe that was because Juice was beyond guarded. He stayed home, he didn't communicate with the guys at all, even when they came over to check in on him, he didn't speak. The first three days after his overdose was spent in a daze in his bed. He only got up to go to the bathroom and that was it. He hadn't eaten much since then either. Nikki had tried her best to get him to open up, the last straw was when she tried to use Willow to get him to open up. She placed their daughter on the bed, and she inched her way up to her father, who only sighed when she reached his face.

Nikki had been cleaning the kitchen all morning, and now into the early afternoon, she was fried. She put Willow down for a nap, and decided she would go shower, completely ignoring Juice who was sitting on the couch staring at the walls. The only thing she said was: "You think you can keep an ear on Willow while I shower? If she wakes up or cries pick her up and give her a bottle." Juice didn't even flinch at the words, and Nikki grew even angrier, and stormed off down the hall before she did or said something she'd regret later.

The warm water cascaded down her body, and she reveled in it, allowing it to take away her thoughts and anger. She leaned forward stretching her back and allowing the water to hit it. It was at that same time, while her arms were against the shower wall, and her head pointed down. Through her watery eyes she noticed something. Her eyes grew wide, and she stood straight up. Her hands shaking as she traced her fingers lightly over the small pouch that started to form in her belly.

* * *

Juice heard every single word Nikki had spoken to him; unfortunately his brain was still fogged up and mushy. He felt like a complete idiot for taking the pills, but he just wanted the voices to stop, Jax's voice, Tully's voice, his sisters voice, and a thousand other peoples voices, he just wanted them to be quiet! Maybe he took one pill too many, maybe he took a dozen too many, who the fuck knows anymore. He doesn't even remember how many he took anyways.

He never wanted to die, he loved Nikki and Willow too much to leave them, but he knew one thing. He had to get out of here. He needed to get away for a while. Just to clear his head, and straighten things out, it would be the only way to shut the voices up. He had to go see his sister.

Juice made his way into his bedroom, pulled out a small bag and threw the basics in there. When he was done he peaked into the bathroom, and watched Nikki's figure. Her back turned towards him, head down, her arms wrapped around her body. He felt like a bastard for putting her through all of this, but things would get better. He would do the right thing, finally.

From there Juice made his way into his daughter's room, where she was sleeping soundly. He smiled, "I love you baby girl, don't you ever forget that. Daddy love's you." He leaned over and placed the softest kiss to her forehead, and her tiny hands jerked up, but still she slept on. Then he made his way into the kitchen where he scribbled down on a piece of paper a quick note to Nikki. He placed it on the fridge where he knew she'd find it. Sighing to himself, he looked around the house one last time, before opening the door, and stepping out.

* * *

Nikki heard the familiar rev of a motorcycle engine start up, and then drifted away. The noise was startling, had one of the guys came over and she didn't hear it? She had been so wrapped up in her thoughts, maybe she didn't notice. She finished her shower quickly, and dressed even quicker. The sound of her daughter crying forced her to throw some clothes on and she ran into Willow's room, and scooped the crying child up into her arms. Willow instantly quieted down at the contact of her mother.

"Where's daddy?" Nikki asked in a soft voice, "Let's go find daddy." Nikki made her way out of the room, balancing her daughter on her arm, and bouncing her at the same time. When Nikki got to the living room, she had expected to see Juice sitting in the same spot she had left him in, but she quickly noticed he wasn't there. He wasn't in the kitchen either, however there was a note on the fridge that read:

 _Nikki and Willow, I love you both so much and it hurts me to know that I hurt you both._

 _My actions were beyond dumb, and it should never have happened, but it did._

 _I can only say I'm sorry and it won't happen again, and I will make sure of it. Right now though,_

 _I need some alone time. I need to get my head clear, please don't worry about me, I will be home soon._

 _I love you both,_

 _Juan Carlos._

Nikki's knee's buckled under her, and she almost fell to her knees, her hand gripping the counter top for support stopped the fall. Once she got over the initial shock of the note, she dropped it to the floor, and ran outside with her daughter still cradled in her arms. Juice was gone.


	18. Chapter 18

**_Hey my lovelies! Sorry it's been a while, I feel like I say this all the time lol. Anyways, an update is finally here. Hope you all enjoy it, and I'll have the next chapter up soon. Please review, I'd like to know what you all think of Alice and little Damien. :)_**

* * *

 ** _Chapter Eighteen_**

Alice was currently scrubbing her kitchen floors, the television on in the living room was blasting and she yelled at her eight year old son to turn the TV down. Seconds after the doorbell rang, and she huffed slipping out of the yellow cleaning gloves and ran to answer the door.

She wasn't ready for this, and the thought of an inspector coming into her house and finding it only half clean, and her son not listening or helping her clean up only frustrated her more. Did he not understand that if the house and herself did not meet the states requirements this time, he would be taken away for good this time?

She swung the door open, sweet already beading on her brow, and was shocked to see a distant yet familiar face. "Hi Alice, long time no see."

Alice was stuck for words, and when she opened her mouth to say something, she couldn't. She choose to step aside instead and let him in.

"Juan, what are you doing here?" She asked, shocked to see her little brother standing in her living room.

"I needed to see you. I need to talk to you."

"Now's not a good time, I'm trying to clean and… Damien will you please turn that god dammed TV down, for the last time. If I have to ask you again I am going to beat your ass. Sorry, my son doesn't listen, gotta light a fire under his ass to get him to do something." Alice laughed. Juice however refrained from laughing. He was shocked, first of all, that she even had a kid, second, because the state of her was something he didn't recognize.

"Listen Alice, I just need some time with family, you are all I ever had. I just…" Juice was cut off by the sound of the doorbell, and Alice sighed once again. "Damien, turn the TV off. You have to be on your best behavior or you will be taken away, do you understand me?" Damien nodded his head, and tiredly rubbed his eyes.

Juice stood behind his sister, looking at the nephew he never he knew had. He was a spitting image of her with dark brown hair that came down to his jaw line, and big brown eyes, which held dark circles underneath them, and his pale white skin gave Juice enough signal that the kid didn't get out very much.

"Alice." Juice said, grabbing her shoulders, "What is going on here?

"You need to leave. Whatever you need, I probably can't help you. I have enough shit to deal with right now." Alice stomped off to answer the door. There stood a woman and a man, both held clipboards, and the woman and a rolling back pack with her. "Good afternoon Ms. Tully."

"Hello." Alice said with a shaky voice, as she stepped aside allowing the guests in.

"Who is this?" The woman asked, eyeing Juice.

"This is my brother. He came expectantly, and he is just leaving."

The woman stepped forward, and held out her hand, "I'm Kendra Jackson, I'm with Child protective Services, and this is my partner, Richard Hendricks. Your sister never mentioned she had a brother."

Alice eyed Juice, mentally screaming at him.

"Juan Carlos." Juice answered, shaking her hand, "I doubt she'd have mentioned me, since I live in another state. I thought I'd surprise her, and come see how she is doing." Juice said, smiling, trying his best to play it cool.

"Your sister needs a lot of help, Juan Carlos, it's good that you are here. Someone should be looking after her and this place and Damien… Speaking of which, where is the boy?" Kendra asked, looking around the half clean apartment.

"Living room." Alice said, her voice still quivering. Kendra and Richard turned towards the living room, and Juice grabbed his sister's arm, "You better tell me what's going on here." Alice pulled her arm out of Juices grip, "I don't have to explain anything to you. Where the hell have you been for the past ten years?" Alice stomped off to the living room, and took a seat on the couch next to her son.

"It's nice to see you Damien. How have you been doing?" Kendra asked. Damien sat next to his mother, staring down at his lap, he didn't answer, causing Kendra to repeat the question, "Damien… Damien, look at me please. I asked you how you are doing." This time, Kendra's voice was soft yet firm, unlike the snippy tone she took with Alice and Juice in the kitchen.

Damien looked up at the woman who called herself his _"case worker"_ and replied with a short, "Fine, thanks," then adverted his gaze back down to his lap. "Damien, is there anything you would like to say before you show Mr. Jackson your bedroom?" Kendra asked, and Damien shook his head. This was the part Alice always feared, mainly because she didn't trust this bitch. She wanted to take her baby away from her. Sure she wasn't perfect, and she's done some fucked up things, but she's trying to make a difference in her life, she's slowly getting her shit together, if the pieces would just start fitting into place and stop falling out things would be better. "Okay buddy, let me see your room. How is school going?" Mr. Jackson asked, as he headed down the hallway with Damien.

"Ms. Tully, How are things going with you?"

"Things are just fine." Alice replied, her tone sharp.

"How is the job seeking going, have you found anything yet?"

"I've put in many applications, but… no, no one has called me back yet." Alice started biting her thumb nail, a nervous habit she had since she was a child. Juice wanted to reach out to her, pull her hand away from her mouth, maybe give it a little squeeze, just to let her know he was here for her and everything would be ok, but he refrained from touching her.

"How are you doing with the drugs and alcohol?"

"I'm still going to my meetings, I'm… I'm still clean."

"How is Damien doing in school?"

"He still struggles a bit. It's hard for him. I know I'm a shitty mother, but I'm trying to pull my life together." Tear rolled down her cheeks, and her knee was bouncing up and down.

"And what about you psychiatrist? Are you still seeing her?"

Alice nodded, and sniffled, "Every week."

"Good, that's good." Kendra finished writing something down, and folded her arms against her legs, leaning forward, "I just have one more question for you? How is it you are able to put food on the table and keep a roof over your head if you have no job?"

"I, uh, I pick up odd jobs here and there. I babysit my neighbors daughter on the weekends. We get by."

"What I'm asking you, Alice, is are you doing anything illegal, is that how you are getting by?"

"You think I'm selling?" Alice rolled her head back, a laugh escaped her mouth, her eyes even more red and teary then before. "I'm not selling. I do what I need to do. Now, get your shit, and get the fuck out of my house, now." Alice yelled standing up, and pointing to the door.

"Ms. Tully, please calm down. You understand I have to ask you these questions, for the well fare of your child. I will check in again next month. You better have a job, or we are going to have to place your son in the care of someone that can take care of him."

After Kendra and Richard left, Juice turned towards his sister, worry all over his face. They stared at each other, and before Juice had a chance to open his mouth, Alice walked down the hallway to her son's room.

Juice was surprised to see how clean the room was. White walls, cleaned well -made bed, all the toys were in the toy box, and there was a small bookcase with a couple books. The dresser was spotless, not so much as a speck of dust on it.

Juice watched from the doorway, as Alice knelt on her knees in front of her son, and brought him into a hug. "We did baby. Your still with me." She kissed his cheek, then leaned back looking at her child. "What did Mr. Hendricks ask you this time, same old stuff?" Alice asked.

"Yeah, but this time he asked me about daddy." Damien paused a moment, and looked up at Juice, "Mommy, who is that man?"

"Uh, That is your…" Alice paused, not wanting to tell the truth. She wished her brother would just go away and leave them alone, "uncle."

"I didn't know I had an uncle." Damien said.

Juice walked into the child's bedroom, and got on his knees next to his sister. "Hey buddy. How are you?" Juice asked, with a smile, "My name is Juan Carlos, but everyone calls me Juice."

"Uncle Juice." Damien said, just testing the name on his lips, and then he giggled, "That's funny." Damien said, his bright smile lighting up his face. Then his smile twisted, as he clenched his stomach, and a loud grumble filled the room. "I feel sick." Damien said.


End file.
